Sometimes all you can do is say goodbye.
Spring is the best time to clear out the baggage and purge what’s really cluttering up your life. But it's not just your clothes and old make-up ... you also need to spring clean the toxic people in your life!
So it’s time to clear out old flames ... and residual baggage, too. Out with the old, and in with the new, attractive and incredibly exciting.
How to spring clean what REALLY matters:
Part one: Your dating strategy.
If you find that you are only attracting “just ok” guys at your favorite singles places, and even on your favorite inline dating websites- change them! Try a new dating site. I like Checkhimout.com because it’s the new forward thinking style of dating where women are in the driver’s seat (no more being hit on by gross guys who don’t get the hint).
If you’re really ready to take charge of your love life and find your Mr. Right, then grab the reins and do it!
Think about who in your life have you been holding onto for really no reason at all...
Who doesn’t serve you anymore?
Who is more of a burden?
Who transformed from being a crush to just a crutch?
Who makes you feel used?
Who is just a booty call to you (or you are to them)?
Think about…is being a booty call serving me? Is it hurting me?
You’ve heard the saying that you can’t open a new door until the old door is shut. Time to clear those closets of old baggage and refresh your love life.
Why? Because you deserve to be happy and fulfilled. You deserve to love and be loved. Starting now!
Part two: Spring clean your friends.
If you have friends who consistently don’t support you, make you feel bad about yourself, leave you drained, make you feel like you’re a burden, “use” you… it’s time to purge them.
YES, people can be pollutants too — personal pollutants! Even family, “forever” friends from your childhood, and new friends who you have a shared connection with can actually be toxic. Like the mold in the corners of your shower, ignoring the problem and allowing it to persist unchanged is not going to make it go away. In fact, it will only allow it to fester, get worse, and possibly even make you sick.
As nerve-wracking as it may be, it’s time to make the necessary shift in your relationship.
So what do you do? Look at the people who you choose to surround yourself with, and the people you feel you "have to" to surround yourself with — for whatever the reason.
Now ask yourself these questions:
How does each person “serve” you?
What do they provide for you?
Is it a two-way, mutually beneficial, uplifting, encouraging, enlightening, or comforting relationship?
Or do you feel drained, exhausted, angry, sad, insecure, unimportant, uninteresting, or annoyed after hanging out with them?
It’s those people, the energy suckers, the Debbie downers, the ego-deflators, the de-motivators, the people who pull you back or hold you down who serve no healthy purpose in your life that you simply don’t need any more.
Part three: You know who needs to go ... now what?
Have a heart-to-heart. If you think that the relationship has the potential of being fixed, or at least improved enough so that it makes sense for you, it’s time to really talk. This is not an opportunity to place blame, point fingers, or get nasty. That’s why it’s called a “heart to heart.” Be honest.
Back off. It may seem like sort of a cop-out way to go, but simply backing off of the relationship, without addressing it, could be your best, non-confrontational out. Stop returning calls as swiftly, stop being so available for plans, stop making the time for elongated chats.
Break up. Some relationships, like romantic relationships, long-time friendships, and sometimes family members require you to actually have the dreaded “break-up” conversation. Don’t be mean. Just be honest and fair.