Mom Says She Purposefully Shuns Her Son's Wife Because She Bullied Her Daughter In High School
Some say let bygones be bygones, but what her daughter-in-law did was too much to forgive.
hedgehog94 / Shutterstock A woman is worried her son will become estranged after she shunned his wife for bullying her daughter in high school.
Posting in Reddit's "r/TrueOffMyChest" subreddit, she explained why she cannot let go of how her daughter-in-law treated her daughter, even though it was many years ago.
In her Reddit post, she described the heartbreaking effects the woman's bullying had on her daughter, and how it all came to a head at a recent family gathering.
The bullying began when her daughter was a sophomore in high school.
The woman explained that she doesn't know why her daughter-in-law Ella targeted her daughter, but that it escalated quickly.
She writes that Ella and her friends "made comments about her body, her nose, everything," and that her daughter developed an eating disorder, including "intense exercises" and "long fasting periods."
Even as her daughter lost a shocking amount of weight, she writes that "Ella and her friends showed no mercy and continued to harass my daughter."
Her daughter then developed "destructive behaviors" and had to be hospitalized for a time.
She thought graduation would be the end, but then her son began dating her daughter's bully.
Her daughter was devastated by her brother dating "someone who bullied her so closely to death," so much so that she sometimes cried herself to sleep at night.
When her son proposed to Ella, she allowed it, but has kept her distance from Ella ever since, including at a recent gathering with her other daughters-in-law to which Ella was not invited.
The gathering was kept a secret from Ella, but she found out about it when one of the woman's other daughters-in-law mentioned it in front of her at a recent family gathering.
The bully confronted her mother-in-law, demanding to know what she had done to alienate her—and the woman did not hesitate to tell her.
The woman says she "let her have it," writing, "I told her that her treatment of my daughter in their high school years is why I will never view her as a member of this family."
She went on to tell Ella that allowing her to be anywhere near her family was a gesture of kindness itself, and "she should not push her luck."
Ella was deeply hurt by her mother-in-law's comments but made no attempts to apologize to her or the daughter she bullied.
The woman added that she speaks of her bullying of her sister-in-law "with dark humor."
The woman now fears her son will go "no contact," but she writes, "I will not chase him because he chose this bully over his sister."
Most commenters supported the woman for the way she handled things.
One user wrote, "Good for you. Nothing Ella can say will undo the damage. You're right to continue to protect your daughter from her tormentor."
The user went on to say she was "stupefied" by the woman's son, a sentiment many other commenters agreed with.
One struggled to understand why her son began dating Ella in the first place, asking, "didn’t he know the trauma she caused?"
Another Redditor agreed, calling the son "a POS [piece of sh-t]" for dating someone who "ruined his sister's self-esteem and self image."
And of course, Ella inspired fury in many Redditors too.
One person wrote, "Please don't feel guilty for excluding such a horrible person from both of your lives... She does not deserve to be around either of you."
Ella's "dark humor" about bullying her sister-in-law didn't sit well either.
As one user put it, "there's a saying that goes something like 'Gallows humor is only funny for those that are on the gallows'."
"...[F]or her to never apologize and to make sick jokes about it? I'm livid on [you and your] daughter's behalf."
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John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice and human interest topics.