Sex

I Wore A Vibrator Around Town — And Let My Husband Control It

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What It's Like To Use A Wireless Remote Control Vibrator (& Have Orgasms In Public)

My husband and I are big fans of sex toys.

It's not that our sex life is lacking without them, but they just add an extra special something to the already great sex life we have.

Besides, let's be honest, once you throw a vibrator into the mix, your partner gets quite a bit of help in giving you intense orgasms, so a lot of the pressure is taken off of them — and that's a good thing, especially for women who have a hard time having orgasms during sex.

Recently, my husband and I got our hands on a remote control vibrator called the We-Vibe 4 Plus. If you haven't heard of it, this is definitely a breakthrough in the world of couples sex toys.

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Not only does its shape make for an ideal snug fit (it's shaped like a U and sort of clips into place), but its wireless design means you can have lots of sexy fun even when you're not together or at home.

Perhaprs the best part of all is it can be synced to your phone. This means your partner can be anywhere in the world (think about what this means for long distance relationships!) and control the speed and intensity you experience as you wear or play with it.

I know!

I was just as confused, skeptical, and all OMG, too!

So, my husband and I decided to put it to the test.

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"Was My Crotch Visibly Vibrating?"

First we messed around with the remote control. It was a Saturday morning, so why not start the day off right?

I was in the bedroom with the remote vibrator and he was in the kitchen with the control. Living in one of those overpriced shoebox apartments in NYC, the 10-foot range in which the remote control works was ideal for us.

It was really fun and exciting, but since the range, if we used the app, would allow for even more space between us, we just had to take our sex toy game up a notch.

It took us awhile to figure out how to sync our phones with the remote vibrator. It wasn't that it was difficult, but the necessary notifications to connect us kept ending up in our spam folders. But then we got it together! So, it was time for us to really get the party started.

Once it was quite clear that my husband could control the sex toy when I was on the first floor of my apartment building (we live on the 5th), I ventured outside to do, of all things, errands.

With my vibrator clipped in place and a tight pair of yoga pants for even more support, I went to get my dry-cleaning.

Just as I reached in my wallet to pay for it, my husband, from back in our apartment, turned on the vibrator. I immediately went into panic mode.

Could they hear the faint buzzing? Was my crotch visibly vibrating? Could they notice that I was blushing?

As a means to quell my own paranoia, I immediately brushed off the vibrating sound as my phone, which I'm sure they couldn't even hear, but you know, neuroses is a cross I have to bear, and I feverishly dug through my bag pretending to look for it. It was all very flamboyant and dramatic of me, and completely unnecessary, but then my husband turned off the vibrator, and I managed to gain some composure.

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"I Felt Like I Had A Dirty Secret'

Next, I headed to Duane Reade to pick up a few things and, of course, halfway there, the sex toy was turned back on — then off, then on again, then off.

So there I am walking east on East 2nd Street trying to walk in such a way that would keep my remote vibrator from wiggling it's way out of my, well, vagina.

There was no one on the street during this part of our experiment, so I was able to enjoy it far more. I felt like I had a dirty secret; a wonderful dirty secret, and not only did I feel like I was sex on the move, but I felt sort of vulnerable in a good way. It was really hot for me to think of my husband at home, enjoying this game as much as I was, but in a different way.

As much as I enjoyed the wandering around doing my errands to keep things spicy and surprising, I knew the best place for me to really enjoy it would be if I went to a bar, sat down, and got a drink. I knew sitting, without the concern of the vibrator somehow wiggling it's way out of my yoga pants, would allow for much more relaxing enjoyment … and it did.

Oh, how it did.

It wasn't quite orgasm great, because I don't think I could relax enough to climax in a public place, but it definitely felt good, and with my husband at the controls, the surprise factor was one of the best parts.

After a little while, I decided to head back to the apartment — with the vibrator buzzing the whole way — because, as I'd find out, he'd thought he turned it off, but had not.

Obviously, we both need to work on this bit. He needs to learn how to use the app better and I need to learn to relax.

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"Definitely A Fun Experiment"

Takeaway? It was awesome. It was freeing and exciting to take our bedroom play into the streets, even if I couldn't completely be at ease with it.

I know that we won't make it a habit of using the We-Vibe 4 Plus in such a way, but it was definitely a fun experiment.

Since my husband and I spend some time apart because I'm from NYC and he's from Paris, a sex toy like this is going to make our long distance relationship feel, in some ways, less long distance.

The sexual connection this particular couples sex toy offers is far different than a lot of the other ones I've experienced and, as one who writes about sex, I have a decent size collection of toys for the sexy times.

Personally, I think the best sex toys are the ones in which both partners have an equal part in using it. We-Vibe 4 Plus is definitely a perfectly example of this.

I've already recommended We-Vibe 4 Plus to a bunch of my friends, and those who have already bought it, have been pleasantly surprised by how much fun it is.

Granted, no one else has tried to do errands while wearing it (yet!), but considering I did that for the sake of scientific research for vibrator lovers the world over, I don't expect any of them to ever try it, to be honest.

But as long as they're having fun with it in every other way the We-Vibe 4 Plus offers, then I'll be a happy camper.

Everybody deserves a happy and healthy sex life, and an app and remote-controlled orgasm is just the ticket.

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Amanda Chatel is a writer who divides her time between NYC and Paris. She's a regular contributor to Bustle and Glamour, with bylines at Harper's Bazaar, The Atlantic, Forbes, Livingly, Mic, The Bolde, Huffington Post and others. Follow her on Twitter or on Facebook for more.