Why Is My Family Being So Hard On Me Because Of My Divorce?

You're already going through the motions. How are their snarky comments making it any better?

woman being consoled
Advertisement

As if going through a divorce isn't difficult enough, being let down by your family's lack of support is absolutely heartbreaking. You just lost the love of your life — the fact that the people you thought you could trust to have your back don't get why their constant jabs are so painful to deal with makes everything so much more worse.

Advertisement

We get it. On the outside looking in, everything looked perfect to them. To them, you had the perfect house, kids, and life; they just don't understand what went wrong. But that doesn't give them any right to judge you and make you feel ashamed. Even expert Dr. Shoshana Bennett agrees that it's in the aftermath of the breakup that you need your family's love and support the most. Just because you got a divorce definitely doesn't mean that you failed. How can they expect you to pick yourself off and move on if you can feel their judgement and shame in waves? It goes without saying that no one likes being judged.

Advertisement

If you wan't them to give you some space to just breathe and find yourself, being honest with how you feel is a start. We know what it's like; you can get through this. It's just going to take some time learning how to put one foot in front of the other and moving on. If that doesn't work, a family therapist may be able to point you guys in the right direction so you can heal — together.