10 Lessons Only A Slut Can Teach You

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10 Lessons Only A Slut Can Teach You
Believe it or not, a slut can teach you some very valuable lessons on sex, love and life.

By Julie Robinson

If I could have three wishes from a Genie they would be the following: Jason Giambi would happily agree to have sex with me, drinking beer would dramatically improve my figure and the word "slut" would lose its negative connotation and become a widely accepted term of endearment far and wide. I'm pretty firm in my conviction that number twenty-three will eventually come around, but I'm afraid the other two wishes are a wee bit far-fetched. A girl can dream.

A girl can also embrace her "slut status" with grace and dignity. That's right my friends. There are methods to the madness that is the promiscuous adult female. Sure, there are moments when she becomes completely crazy, but that's half of the fun when you’re interacting with and living the life of a slut.

If you've been a slut for as many years as I have and you pay attention to the men who flit into and out of your world, you can gain a lot of information other more sedate women are not privy to. You already know that knowledge is power—but do you know how to give a killer blow job? I didn't think so.

Men and women alike can learn from the established, non-apologetic slut. I probably have dozens of lessons up my sleeve. I have a Ph.D. in curriculum and instruction. Here are ten lessons you can learn from a slut: 

1. Fat and naked is still naked. I know you look better when you've shed a few pounds. Honestly, besides Twiggy, who doesn't? You probably have more confidence and feel ever-so more desirable when you can fit into your skinny jeans. That's great but don’t let it stop you from getting naked with a new guy you really want to get naked with.

Naked—even rolling fat, cellulite naked—is still naked and okay by just about every single guy out there. Trust me. I know this. I've been with them, remember? Healthy body weight with tone is a terrific goal, but unless you are super-disciplined, it's not terribly realistic. I prefer being with men with six pack abs just like the rest of the women out there. I get it. I just don't let my gut dictate what I get to do with some adorable hottie who doesn't care about how much my stomach hangs out.

2. Horny is not sexy. Sluts don't have the pleasure of many men because they are hornier than other women. Horny isn't sexy because it turns the encounter into sex (and sex only) instead of the chase, conquest, tease and flirt that it warrants. I find that sending a playful text with a teaser gets a much higher response rate than a simple come-over-and-have-sex-with-me text.

The same is true on the receiving end. When I get a booty call in the middle of the night from a man who professes his horniness to me, I'm more than a little annoyed. I prefer a man who knows how to work it by leading me in with an alluringly flirtatious invitation.

3. Pull the trigger, tease. Teasing playfully and being a tease are two entirely different things. If you're going to lead a man down the slippery slope that could be your V, you had better be able to pull the trigger. Do you need to do it the minute he wants? Nope. Should you do it the first time you get the urge to unzip his fly? Not necessarily.

You should, however, know that if you're encouraging the man to believe you're up for sex, you should eventually be up for sex. Slut may be a four letter word but "tease" is way worse. It's dishonest. It's playing into my hand because I'm the woman he is having sex with after you got him all riled up.

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