When I was a little girl I remember watching all the Disney Princess movies (You know the ones: Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella, Snow White, Aladdin… there seemed to be an endless supply), and I loved everything about those fairy tale stories—the handsome prince, the white dress, the cake, the pumpkin stagecoach, and the big castle to live happily ever after in—I always pictured my future playing out just like my favorite princesses. Doesn't every girl?
We all know the saying "first comes love, then comes marriage," and when you feel you've found your perfect match, you start to picture yourself eventually settling down. You see the future, you see building a strong and wonderful married life together, and even creating a family. You start imagining fairy tales and castles and Cinderella dresses... How Disney Messed Up Your Romance
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But you know what? It's not that simple. I wish it were. There's a lot more to marriage than just the love you feel for one another. The Beatles' might have said, "All you need is love," but real life doesn't work that way. Ever. Marriage requires effort.
Before you start calling up wedding coordinators and venues, before you start looking for a dress and picking out a cake, put away your emotions long enough to ask yourself a few questions.
What makes this person The One?
Out of all the relationships you've been in, what makes this person the one for you? Answering this question is crucial to prevent yourself from entering a marriage for all the wrong reasons. Never pressure yourself with the idea that you may never have another opportunity to get married. There's always time. Your wedding is just one day while your marriage is for a lifetime. Why I Don't Believe In "The One"
When I met my husband's family for the first time I saw first hand how he treated his sisters. His sisters are 13 and 20 years younger than he is, and when I saw them together, I knew he'd be a great father. Among his other great qualities, that's what sealed the deal for me.
Do you share the same values?
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Issues about careers, finances, raising children, discipline, sex, spending, religion, and values are the most important subjects that need to be addressed before you even think about engagement rings. If you can't plan for and effectively discuss these topics with your partner, you won't be able to merge your two lives together with any amount of success. If you don't feel comfortable bringing them up, then you're not ready to say, "I do." Chemistry, Values and Other Things… How Do I Know He Is the One?
When my husband and I started dating we talked about our personal values and beliefs. We found we shared more in common than either one of us thought. Coming from similar family backgrounds, we found it easy to envision a future together, and another way that made merging our lives together almost effortless.