When you go through something as tough and trying as military training (or war), it can seriously change you. Even after you return home, it still feels like something is missing. Everything that you've seen and experienced out there starts affecting you in some way.
You used to be really active in the bedroom. But now, more often than not, you find yourself turning down sex with your girlfriend. You want to reconnect with her emotionally again, but just can't get in the mood no matter how hard you try. Does that mean that there's something wrong with you?
We've all heard about post traumatic stress disorder and how it impacts you physically and mentally. But what people don't seem to realize is that it also has a negative affect on your sex life. One of our readers raised similar concerns after her boyfriend, with whom she had an amazing sex life, returned from his deployment with a lagging libido.
In her message to bestselling author and relationship guru Dr. John Gray, she says "I'm having post-deployment sex problems. My boyfriend recently got back from a seven-month deployment. Before he left, we had a fantastic sex life. And now that he's back, it's as if his libido is gone. I have tried to initiate it many times but he has made it clear that he's tired or not in the mood. Is this all normal or should I be worried?"
Dr. John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, expertly tackles the issue by suggesting new and non-threatening ways that she can reawaken her man's libido. Despite popular belief, you don't have to fear the libido dip. It's completely natural.
It's important that you show your boyfriend that you're willing to make things work and take things at his pace. Although his methods may seem a bit unusual, they're definitely foolproof!
For more on Dr. John Gray and his book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, visit MarsVenusLiving.com. To chime in with your own advice, check out the original question here. Finally, if you have your own relationship conundrum, ask for advice at http://www.yourtango.com/questions.