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The Links: Dating The Life Of The Party

robert downey jr, life of the party
Self

Couples who look alike, pick-up lines, the life of the party & the Obamas' married romance.

Every biweekly, fortnightly that is, I like to forget about coming up with something semi-unoriginal and go full monty on something wholly unoriginal (on my part). I find my favorite stories of the last week or so (on my favorite sites) and let it rip. Sounds fun, right? It is. And easy. Here goes.

Starting off, Lemondrop offers us something weird and possibly deplorable, couples who look alike. That is to say, 2 people in a relationship look (or dress) similarly, not twins dating twins or some such. Somehow people who dress alike love flannel. "No, silly, I am Nuni; she is Nuni."

Glamour serves up some good 411 regarding a man's genies (pronounced jen-eees). Sorry, it's a slide show (safe for work though). I think the first bit of advice is best and it's something Chris Rock has been harping on for a decade, don't use the word "penis" if it can be avoided, it's off-putting. Honestly, there are a million non-clinical synonyms.

And never, ever use "penis" as part of a pick-up line, trust me. The word "pianist" is gold, though. Em & Lo discuss what to do next if your chat-up line actually is well-received. Don't blow it, appologies for any entendre you may be picking up on there.

Be careful, though, if the small talk comes too easily to the dude you're with, he may be the life of the party. The Frisky has a bone to pick with glib, distracted guys. Sometimes being the life of the party is a cross that we must bear… alone.

Asylum appreciates a good party animal, but they know that a good relationship is about close, highly personal communication. They reveal that college-aged couples have a greater chance of "making it" if the girl-partner uses the word "I" frequently in their IMs. Maybe women who use the first person, singular like it's their first name are better at expressing their needs… in bed (it's like a fortune cookie).

Listicles introduces their to 5 woman-boy love stories from film. I didn't realize that you were supposed to be grossed-out by the love scene in Harold And Maude. Uh, crap.

Sometimes Sleeping Beauty happens in real life. According to the Daily Mail, a husband woke his wife from a coma by planting a smooch on her. Andrew Ray asked his wife for a quick snog and she leaned over and puckered up. This is way more romantic than the Englishman who woke his wife from a coma by berating her.

The HuffPo (as the youths have started calling the Huffington Post) had a great take on the Natalie Dylan virginity-for-sale yarn. You remember that old chestnut? At any rate, HuffPoet Carey Polis (which is Greek for the city of encumbrance, I think) is highly dubious of Dylan's pseudo feminist rationale. Then again, old Natty D is fixing to be $4 million dollars richer. Anyone who reads this space with much frequency knows that I also find the fetishization (that's probably not a word) of virginity quite distasteful. 

According to Fox News, a polygamist in Canada is using legalized gay marriage as his defense to bigamy charges. Winston Blackmore (Ernie Hudson was Winston Zeddmore in Ghost Busters) thinks that if two fellas can get married that he can marry twenty women. Maybe he feels his magnanimity ought to be returned tenfold. Does this sort of prove Rick Santorum prescient? That is, are nut-bags going to use legalized gay marriage as precedent for all manner of nuptials nuttiness? Thanks for ruining everything for all of Canada's gays, Winston Blackmore.

And finally, Jezebel likes Rachel Maddow. Like really, really likes her. Possibly in a Single, White Female sort of way. Rachel Maddow used the phrase "married romance" in regard to the Barack and Michelle Obama's public affection and tenderness. Evidently, even if the party is in your honor you can pay close attention to your wife. Good to know, as a life of the party. So, we're all in agreement that the Obamas are a great couple then? Solid, let's get crackin' on this impending economic doom now.

Thoughts? If you've got a suggestions for the next link roundup, hit me at tomfoolery @ tangomag.com.

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