Love

8 Ways To Hook A Sailor During Fleet Week

Among the many incredible traditions that New York has, Fleet Week is right up there (way better than $500 bottles of vodka in the Meat Packing District and about on equal footing as the St. Patrick's Day parade). The week culminates in Memorial Day and features a sea invasion by bell-bottom-wearing patriots. 

But how do you land one of these men bold enough to wear all white before Memorial Day? Follow this quick guide and you'll be expressing your gratitude for their service in no time. 

8) Make fun of the Army. America's land and sea forces have a service-old rivalry that swings between fraternal and bar fighting. Feel free to mention that Navy has beaten Army about 30 times in a row in football.

7) Use a bit of jargon. Even if used incorrectly, it's sort of charming. Examples: head = lavatory, galley = kitchen, rack = bed, Flying Bravo = menstruating, jarhead = marine. Try to avoid the term "squid," it's a bit derogatory but Marines might dig it.

6) Rag on officers when with enlisted and vice versa. Fraternization between officers and enlisted is frowned upon (stateside, anyways), you can use that class tension to appear as a sympathetic figure (i.e. "I side with management, they have nice houses" or "I side with labor, they have integrity"). Enlisted sailors dress like, um, sailors. Officer sailors wear cruise ship captain hats. And Marines often involve the color brown in some capacity. (Check out this link for what their rank emblems signify.)

5) Ask for photos. This is a nice, DL shy girl technique across the board. Ask to wear their hat (called a cover) for the photo. This is a good time to ask what patches, ribbons and other accoutrements on their uniform mean.

4) Ask about their MOS (Military Occupation Specialty). While a sailor's job might be cooking, slinging hash at Bennigan's isn't anywhere near as exciting as serving chow while chasing Somali pirates. DO NOT ask when they get out or their plans for civilian life, such eventualities are too enticing and too terrifying to ponder (for the most part). 

3) Thank them. Yeah, it sounds a little cheeser, but these guys are doing us a pretty decent solid vis-à-vis risking their lives for our freedom, safety and whatnot. A high five on that account is a pretty good icebreaker.

2) Buy some drinks. Sometimes stereotypes are off base, sometimes there's a grain of truth and other times they're dead-on. There is a stereotype that sailors like to drink, feel free to explore it. It could go pretty well with #3.

1) When all else fails ask if they know about anything long, hard and full of seaman. Sure it's juvenile and cliché but so is every other pick-up line, we'll let it pass because it's Fleet Week.

Bonus: If you run into a fighter pilot (you'll know when you do, can't miss 'em) feel free to quote every line from Top Gun and An Officer And A Gentleman, don't lose that lovin' feeling, let love lift you up where you belong and take me to bed or lose me forever.

Bonus 2: If you're feeling jaunty (or sassy or spunky), crank up the juke to the Village People's "In The Navy," should be good for a laugh or two.

Among the many incredible traditions that New York has, Fleet Week is right up there (way better than $500 bottles of vodka in the Meat Packing District and about on equal footing as the St. Patrick's Day parade). The week culminates in Memorial Day and features a sea invasion by bell-bottom-wearing patriots. 

But how do you land one of these men bold enough to wear all white before Memorial Day? Follow this quick guide and you'll be expressing your gratitude for their service in no time. 

8) Make fun of the Army. America's land and sea forces have a service-old rivalry that swings between fraternal and bar fighting. Feel free to mention that Navy has beaten Army about 30 times in a row in football.

7) Use a bit of jargon. Even if used incorrectly, it's sort of charming. Examples: head = lavatory, galley = kitchen, rack = bed, Flying Bravo = menstruating, jarhead = marine. Try to avoid the term "squid," it's a bit derogatory but Marines might dig it.

6) Rag on officers when with enlisted and vice versa. Fraternization between officers and enlisted is frowned upon (stateside, anyways), you can use that class tension to appear as a sympathetic figure (i.e. "I side with management, they have nice houses" or "I side with labor, they have integrity"). Enlisted sailors dress like, um, sailors. Officer sailors wear cruise ship captain hats. And Marines often involve the color brown in some capacity. (Check out this link for what their rank emblems signify.)

5) Ask for photos. This is a nice, DL shy girl technique across the board. Ask to wear their hat (called a cover) for the photo. This is a good time to ask what patches, ribbons and other accoutrements on their uniform mean.

4) Ask about their MOS (Military Occupation Specialty). While a sailor's job might be cooking, slinging hash at Bennigan's isn't anywhere near as exciting as serving chow while chasing Somali pirates. DO NOT ask when they get out or their plans for civilian life, such eventualities are too enticing and too terrifying to ponder (for the most part). 

3) Thank them. Yeah, it sounds a little cheeser, but these guys are doing us a pretty decent solid vis-à-vis risking their lives for our freedom, safety and whatnot. A high five on that account is a pretty good icebreaker.

2) Buy some drinks. Sometimes stereotypes are off base, sometimes there's a grain of truth and other times they're dead-on. There is a stereotype that sailors like to drink, feel free to explore it. It could go pretty well with #3.

1) When all else fails ask if they know about anything long, hard and full of seaman. Sure it's juvenile and cliché but so is every other pick-up line, we'll let it pass because it's Fleet Week.

Bonus: If you run into a fighter pilot (you'll know when you do, can't miss 'em) feel free to quote every line from Top Gun and An Officer And A Gentleman, don't lose that lovin' feeling, let love lift you up where you belong and take me to bed or lose me forever.

Bonus 2: If you're feeling jaunty (or sassy or spunky), crank up the juke to the Village People's "In The Navy," should be good for a laugh or two.