Sexologist Dr. Brian Parker doles out pointers for ladies with foreplay-resistant men.
Why do men seem to have a hard-wired disdain for generous servings of foreplay?
Women have probably internally wondered for centuries why men devour sex like a two-bite dollar meal instead of savoring like a five-course feast. Let's be honest, more times than not, a metaphorical bill has arrived before most women have even had a chance to finish buttering the bread.
Do they think we don't want foreplay? Are they just super-selfish? Lazy? Take us for granted? Secretly inexperienced?
These are all pretty valid questions.
Hitchedmag.com tackled this aged old sexual dilemma. Sexologist Dr. Brian Parker defended his gender as Dr. Trina Read claimed men just want to "pop off a couple of orgasms" and hit the hay.
(We couldn't have said it better ourselves.)
Here are Dr. Brian Parker's explanations and tips to get your fella more interested in tasting all the appetizers before paying the check:
1. Play into his masculinity.
"At a very young age boys are taught that things like hugging, kissing and touching are feminine," said Dr. Parker. "And, God forbid, any Wrangler wearin’, meat eatin’ man with a shed full of tools seems 'girly.'"
2. Tell him straight up.
"Truth is, most men don’t know diddly squat about the female body’s erogenous zones and her sexual response cycle," he said. Dr. Parker advises women to simply ask their men what like to give and receive, and vice versa.
"And if you can’t bare to tell him, show him," he said. "Guide his hands over your 'hot' spots showing him just how you like to be touched."
3. Use the "sensate focus" tool.
This is when couples explore each other's entire body.
"Remember, we are sexual beings from the ends of our hair to the tips of our toes," said Dr. Parker. "Mutually exploring your bodies will help your partner learn exactly what you like. And you might learn a little bit about him too. Yes, guys don’t just want to be touched there!"
4. Play on his selfishness.
"Tell him that foreplay lasts longer than sex (generally about 12 minutes) and that the longer you touch, slurp and fondle, the more explosive the orgasm is for you…and him."