mr. wrong
Before saying "I do," ask yourself these five questions.
Why do smart women settle for Mr. Wrong? Let's take a look at one of my clients. Nina is a beautiful brunette with a magnetic personality. She has a large circle of friends and a fabulous social life. Why did this dynamic twenty-something give it all up to marry a compulsive liar?
"I was twenty-eight years old and all of my friends were getting married. We had dated for three years and I didn't want to waste all the time invested in the relationship. I also ignored the fact that he lied about everything. He lied about his … Read More
Michelle tries to balance romance with rationale.
Last week, I wrote about my friend Amber's breakup and I mentioned how terrible her boyfriend was. But when the relationship first started, I thought he was great. I was thrilled to see her with a man who loved her and treated her like a princess. Then, the tides turned. By the end, the best thing that could be said about her ex was that he was nice, sometimes. But more often than not, he was rude, immature, stubborn, and completely disrespectful toward my girl.
Her situation made me wonder why it's easy for so many women to brush … Read More
Can too many Mr. Wrongs make us wary when meeting Mr. Right?
At some point in a woman's life, provided she's single long enough, she'll come to know what one could call dating burnout.
It's like the possibility of finding Mr. Right has cried "wolf" one too many times. She's had enough of engaging third dates that never lead to number four, months-long relationships where commitment talk is taboo and otherwise feeling like she's settling for someone against her gut instinct--just because he's there. Hopeful becomes skeptical, so that when a seemingly "good guy" comes along, warning flags abound: "uh oh, we've been here before."
So was the case … Read More
She thought he was "the one." Did relationship red flags indicate otherwise?
JULY 4, 2002 I’m sitting on our deck in the Hamptons an hour after everyone has left, realizing that my marriage needs to end. There have been too many red flags and it’s been too hard for too long. I’m drained. I’m sad. I’m lonely. My husband is just on the other side of the screen door, sleeping on the sofa we bought together at Ikea right after we bought the house. On his chest, our eleven-month-old daughter drools in her half-sleep.
RED FLAG #1, APRIL 1995 One of my girlfriends leaves a message on my machine … Read More
