Can't Buy Me Love: A Gift Giving Guide

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gift from the heart
Take the stress out of giving gifts to the one you love this year.

Gift giving — Groan

It doesn't matter if you're in a new relationship or you've been married for decades. Choosing a gift that will bring a smile to your partner's lips can be difficult and fraught with traps. 5 Tips To Help You Gift When You're A New Couple

Some people spend a lot of money that they don't really have attempting to buy the "perfect" gift for their love. Others run out to the nearest store and pick the first thing they see, and some completely skip giving gifts to their partner — the stress of picking out something that's just right is too much. The results of all of these methods of giving a gift are probably not what was desired.

Instead of a gleeful reaction and a big kiss and hug of thanks, the results of giving gifts in these ways can leave both people feeling resentful, disappointed, unimportant, taken for granted, and less connected than before.

Let's be clear here ...

It's not the gift that makes your partner love you or desire you. It's not the gift that brings your mate closer to you. You simply cannot buy love — if a close and healthy relationship is what you're looking for. 3 Ingredients For A Healthy Relationship

At the same time, when you pick out and give a gift with care, consideration, and maybe even a sense of adventure and fun, you can enhance the love you have. The process of giving gifts to your love can be a vehicle for more romance, more connection, and more passion.

It's gotta have heart.

Be honest with yourself. If you're only buying your partner a gift because you feel like you have to or because you are worried that he or she will be angry with you or maybe even leave you if you don't, stop right there.

Make sure you're approaching this whole gift-giving process with genuine feeling. A gift given with resentment or guilt is going to fall flat. It could drive your partner even further away from you. 10 Ways To Have A Loving Holiday Season

If there are unresolved tensions or disagreements between you and your mate, take the time to address what's going on and look for new solutions you may not have considered before. Don't use a gift to try to "make up" for your relationship mistakes.

Instead, take care of the conflict and make amends for your mistakes. Next, invite yourself to shift your attitude about giving your partner a gift. Reach within yourself and make a choice about what you will give from a place of genuine care and love.

Take the pressure off in terms of how much you think you should spend and focus in on how you feel about your partner and also what you think he or she might enjoy. In other words, give a gift from the heart. 7 Inexpensive Holiday Gift Ideas

Take a risk.

Get creative about the gift you choose. You can really wow your partner with something you made by hand or a very simple, yet powerful and emotional gift. 

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
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