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Bring Back The Spark & Romance

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Bring Back The Spark & Romance
4 Romance-Inducing Relationship Tips

How would you describe your relationship right now?

Is it...

More from YourTango: 4 Questions You Wish You Never Asked Your Partner

Okay
Has its ups and downs
Fireworks, but of the wrong kind
Snooze-fest kind of boring

Sure, it’s common for a love relationship or marriage to go through spurts of passionate connection and then lulls of distance and dullness. The trick is to not let the lulls take over.

For many couples, over time the spark fades. They take this as natural and normal and just learn to put up with it. Maybe this is the way it is for you.

You are disappointed and ache for the romance and deliciousness of how things used to be in your relationship. You try to revive the spark, but your partner is either too busy or doesn’t take your lead for some other reason.

So, you’ve given up and decided to settle.

Despite your belief that this is “just the way it goes,” if you don’t have what you truly desire in your relationship, then resentment, blame, guilt, anger, sadness and helplessness may well up within you. These can build up and lead to arguments or chilly distance.

What you may have forgotten is that you actually are NOT helpless. You do NOT have to settle for anything less than what you’ve been craving with your partner.

We’re not promising that your long-term relationship will be one take-your-breath-away moment after another. We ARE telling you that you can bring back romance and it doesn’t have to feel like a lot of hard work.

Try these 4 methods for reigniting the spark in your relationship....

#1: Make yourself an irresistible invitation to love.

Want to know the secret to passionate love that lasts? Be irresistible to your partner and, with your words and actions, invite in more of what you want.

This doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to lose 50 lbs. or get a complete makeover. You can be more irresistible by dialing down criticisms and judgments, if that’s your habit. You can be more irresistible by appreciating your partner and your relationship in genuine ways.

And, if you’ve become lax about taking good care of your body, then getting out and exercising and eating a few more salads and a few less double cheeseburgers is also a way to become more irresistible.

#2: Clean up the clutter.

More from YourTango: 4 Game Changers for a Happier Marriage

To make room for more romance in your relationship, take a look at what’s standing in the way. Most people carry around a lot of resentment and painful feelings because of things that happened long, long ago.

This clutters up you and your relationship. It also invites in more of what you don’t want-- the resentment, pain and distance. 

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Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
Other Articles/News by Susie & Otto Collins:

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