3 Steps To Take When You Fall For Your Friend

By

3 Steps To Take When You Fall For Your Friend [EXPERT]
Do you want to take your friendship to the next level?

Jennie is all torn up inside. She recently came to the realization that she's in love. The guy she loves is perfect for her — he loves sports like she does, he's considerate, kind and he even likes her parents. The trouble is that this guy doesn't know she loves him. They've been close friends for years now. They have supported one another through bad relationships, job interviews, career successes and more. Now that they're both single, Jennie is starting to realize that her feelings for him are more than just friends.

The other night, after they played a game of basketball together, she felt so attracted to him; she wanted to reach out and kiss him (and more). She stopped herself because she's afraid of ruining their friendship if he doesn't feel the same way. It happens quite frequently, actually. Two people get to know one another as friends. They enjoy hanging out together, confide in each other and rely on one another. This is great ... until one of them decides that he or she wants more. Is This Normal? I'm In Love With My Friend

 

After that point, the person who has fallen in love with a friend needs to decide whether or not to tell the truth and/or act on those feelings. There is a chance that a wonderful and fulfilling love relationship could bloom from the friendship and that it could just happen naturally. However, there is also a chance that the attraction could be there — for both people — but neither one has the courage to admit it. This scenario leaves two friends hungering for more and afraid to do anything about it.

While some of the longest-lasting and closest love relationships are between people who are truly good friends first, taking that step from friends to romantic lovers can feel like a big and treacherous move to make.

Here are 3 tips to help you decide what to do when you've fallen in love with your friend:

1. Know the risks.

If you value your friendship with this person, we don't advise you to rush in and declare your love for him or her. Acknowledge the risks first. It can be excruciating to pretend that you don't have romantic feelings for your friend and we don't recommend lying. But, we do think it's wise to really come to grips with what you are about to do before you do it. 3 Ways To Open The Door To A New Relationship

You can't know exactly how your friend will react to this news that you have romantic or sexual feelings for him or her. It's possible that your friend will be surprised and maybe a bit shocked by your admission. It's also possible (depending on the circumstances) that knowing how you feel will change the dynamics of your friendship. There is a chance that it will feel "too weird" for him or her to continue to be as close to you as before if the feelings aren't shared or if for some reason you two cannot be together as a couple.

It is also possible that your friend may have not yet realized how he or she feels about you. In other words, your friend's initial reaction might not be what you expected or wanted ... and it might not reflect what's possible. Or maybe it might. 10 Reasons You're Not In A Serious Relationship

Keep reading...

More Juicy Content From YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Susie & Otto Collins

Author

Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire.



 

Location: Columbus, OH
Credentials: BS, CCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues
Other Articles/News by Susie & Otto Collins:

Write Your Own Happy Relationship Story

By

It can be worrisome and may even keep you up at night! We’re talking about studies and poll results about relationships that get shared all over the web and talked about by your friends and family. Unfortunately, some of the findings of social science research are misunderstood, taken out of context or don’t disclose the small sample ... Read more

3 Words That Will Ruin Your Relationship

By

We’ve said them. You’ve said them. Couples said them. Everybody has said (out loud or in our minds) these three very innocent words whose combined meaning packs a mean punch that can knock everything that’s sweet and wonderful right out of a love relationship or marriage. In fact, these three average and ordinary words can even make it ... Read more

I Love You, But...

By

You can't understand why your boyfriend claims you don't show him any respect. You're baffled that your wife says you're "impossible" to please. None of what your partner says makes sense to you because—in your mind—you're always loving and supportive. Before you totally discount what your special someone alleges, ... Read more

See More

 
PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular