Imagine trying to get home early to surprise your man. Before getting out of your car, you check yourself in the mirror to make sure that your hair is just the way he likes it. Then you head to the door and open it...but when you do, you can hear some noise coming from upstairs.
"Maybe he's watching porn?" you think.
As you quietly make your way up the stairs to surprise him, you can hear his grunting getting louder and louder. Suddenly you're not so sure he's watching porn anymore. And when you open his bedroom door, your life literally crumbles before your eyes. He's in bed with some skank.
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Suddenly you feel this horrendous rush of emotion coming over you: anger, sadness, jealousy, rage, fear. It's awful and you most likely wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy. So how can you avoid it? And how can you answer that pesky question, "Is he cheating?" so that you don't have to witness something like this? Well, your best option is to look out for these signs of cheating.
- Sudden Interest In His Appearance
If your man was not particularly interested in how he looked before, but now is suddenly interested in making himself look more attractive, then you may already be wondering is he cheating. Perhaps he has suddenly started to go to the gym, he wants to lose weight and/or to add muscle mass to his body or maybe he is suddenly dressing in a fashionable way, when he wasn't so fashionable before — all these things are quite suspicious for a knowing woman.
If you have spent more time with your man (months, years) and he never actually did this before, then it is normal that you get suspicious. Who is he doing this for—himself, or another woman? Is he cheating or is he planning to cheat? But also make sure to ask yourself if he is just trying to change and to live a healthier life. These questions may eat you up, but the truth is that this alone is not a sign that he is cheating. When it happens along with the following signs, though, then it may be cause for some concern.
In the end, he may just be trying to look better for you and for himself. So accusing him of trying to feel better about his appearance is not fair. After all, if you would decide to lose weight or to change your look, it would not automatically mean that you are cheating on him (or that you are planning to cheat on him, for that matter).
- His Phone Has Suddenly Become A Valuable Diamond
Our phones have become such an important deal in our lives that we actually consider them very personal. In one way or another, they are personal, and most people would not want any random stranger looking at them. When he becomes very protective of his phone though, it is natural that you become suspicious, especially if he never was like that before.
If all of a sudden, he will not allow you to use his phone or he tries to "hide" it from you so that you can't even see his screen then there is a reason to be suspicious that he may be cheating. Furthermore, do bear in mind the fact that putting his phone on airplane mode can stop any kind of incoming text messages and that if you're using his phone on this mode, you will not see if he receives any message. This way, he makes sure that you won’t see any message that may come in and he will be still able to check them out later, when he takes his phone off airplane mode.
Another phone-related action that may show that he is cheating is taking his phone to the bathroom with him. If he always did that, then it may be OK. But if he just started doing it, then he may want to hide something from your eyes.
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- He Totally Overreacts When You Mention The Word "Cheating"
People who feel guilty of something often react in the nastiest ways possible. Some of them just mumble and fumble, while others become downright aggressive. Other people just try to turn the blame on the person who asked them the question that made them feel guilty. In other words, different people react differently.
If you ask your husband or your boyfriend if he is cheating and he reacts in a totally overblown way, then it may be a sign that he was feeling guilty and feels that he's been “spotted”. An elusive answer may be a minor sign (as he may just not think you're serious about this question), but larger signs would include becoming aggressive and trying to make it appear as if you are the one who is cheating and who feels guilty about it. Again, reactions can be different, but the more intense your husband’s or boyfriend’s reaction will be, the more chances there will be that he is actually cheating on you.
- He Suddenly Loves Showering
OK, it is totally normal that a man wants to be clean and nice-smelling, and I'm sure you like that idea too. But when the first thing he does when he gets back home is go into the shower, you may become suspicious that he could possibly be cheating.
If he is actually cheating, then he will be doing this because he wants to take any fragrances and odors off his body. But this alone isn't always cause for concern. He could have recently changed jobs to something a bit more "industrial."
- He Is Away For Longer & Longer
At the very beginning of your relationship, you may have been together all the time and even hated spending time apart. When he suddenly and unexplainably starts to avoid seeing you (out of guilt or just because he may be "busy") or he disappears for more time than before, then you should start to be a little suspicious and think about whether he is cheating.
For instance, if the two of you live together and he usually came home after work (or at least let you know that he is having some drinks with a couple of buddies), but now he just disappears, then you may want to have a discussion with him. He may not be cheating, but you do have the right to know at least in broad terms where he is and when he will be coming home/when he will be able to see you. Just disappearing and not saying anything can definitely be suspicious for anyone and you should discuss this with him, to see exactly what is on his mind.
- He Says You Are The One Cheating
Even if you have not asked him if he is cheating, he may become defensive by constantly accusing you of doing it. When you know that he has absolutely no reason at all to do this, then it can potentially be a sign.
The truth is that people see themselves through the mirror of how they are and a cheater will believe everybody around him is doing the same things they are. This is why he may become suddenly jealous and overprotective without any apparent reason and why he may feel downright paranoid at times when it comes to the idea that you would be cheating on him.
In the end, you should not become all paranoid about all the signs of his potential cheating. Remember that relationships are built on trust and communication and that trying to constantly get him on the wrong foot will do neither of you any good. You should aim to trust him at all times, but be wary when the signs start to be more and more pronounced.
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