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5 Myths About Gay Men Debunked

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Think all gay men love anal sex? Think again.
Not only are these stereotypes unfair — they're untrue!

With same-sex marriage cases Hollingsworth v. Perry (the challenge to California's Proposition 8) and United States v. Windsor (the challenge to the Federal Defense of Marriage Act) in the hands of the Supreme Court, it only seems proper to set aside some stereotypes people have made about gay men and our sexual desires and activities.

For whatever reason, gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgenders and other members affiliated with the (LGBTQ) community keep getting this bad rep for being "sexual deviants of society." Yet, if a married heterosexual couple chooses to embark into their own private world of Fifty Shades Of Grey, enjoying a romp into BDSM, they're doing it under the sanctity of marriage! How many straight, married couples have felt the spontaneous desire to pull off to the side of the road for a quick romp? Understand my point yet?

More from YourTango: Gender-Bending Hollywood: It's Time To Put The Boxing Gloves Down

It's a rather a crude joke that every situation described in the aforementioned paragraph are stereotypical definitions of gay men. With all due respect, until you've been a gay man and walked in his shoes, don't assume to know what makes him stand at attention in his Levi's 501's!

1. All gay men have multiple sex partners! Simply not true. Just because you think it's so, doesn't it make it so. Many gay men casually date and never get to the bedroom together until they're in a monogamous relationship or, at least, have made each other work for it! It's more common than you might think, but you never thought to ask ... did you?

2. Gay men love anal sex! I'm not speaking for all of my gay brothers; however, I can count well beyond all my fingers and toes the number of gay men who don't enjoy anal sex. True, in many gay male relationships, there is one man who is always on bottom and one man who is always on top, but don't assume that this applies to all gay male relationships. In the same sense, you might as well assume that just because a woman has a mouth and a man has a penis that she likes giving blow jobs!

3. Gay men just like to suck! Hate to blow that assumption out of the water (pun intended), yet you would once again be off base to believe that because two gay men have two mouths that they enjoy oral sex. Yes, there are gay men for whom penis admiration is their primal, sexual focus. On the other side of the ball (pun intended), there are also gay men who prefer to simply stroke it and ride it without ever having taken a lick.

More from YourTango: Coming Out In A Marriage: 6 Unrealistic Expectations

4. Gay men are kinky. Please take no offense and none given, but do you really think that the estimated 70 million copies of Fifty Shades Of Grey that have been sold are all sitting on bookshelves in the households of gay men? Enough said! Keep reading ...

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Rick Clemons

Author

Rick Clemons, The Gay Man's Life Coach & The Coming Out Coach

Rick is a straight-forward, compassionate, insightful, challenging, mentor, guide, and Certified Professional Coach who's been featured on The Ricki Lake Show, and is a highly sought after radio show personality, blogger, author, and faculty member of Sex Coach U. His loving, challenging, gentle, and inspiring approach ignites a fire in clients, helping them get through the darkest moments of life and come out the other side, kicking butt, and being authentically themselves.

Rick thrives, working with individuals, and those in their inner circle, as they embark on the journey out of the closet and beyond. He specializes in helping people build confidence, uncover their deepest passions, and live their life's purpose. Authenticity isn't just a word he throws around lightly. It's the backbone of his practice and the manner in which he personnally strives to live each and every day of his own life.

Join Rick's Monthly "Guyz Like Us" Free Coaching Call For Gay Men!

Sign-up for Ricks' Free Video Series, "Coming Out Without Coming Unglued!"

Connect with Rick through his Coming Out & Life Coaching Newsletter.

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Twitter - @rickclemons & @ComingOutCoach
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Location: Riverside, CA
Credentials: ACC, CPC
Specialties: LGBT Issues (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender), Men's Issues, Sexuality
Other Articles/News by Rick Clemons:

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