Compatibility: In A Man's Eyes [EXPERT]
By Deb Dutilh. Posted on .
The other day, I had a great little conversation with my man about compatibility and relationships. Following my game plan about manifesting my ideal man, I had written out a very clear and detailed sensory and emotion based description of him. It included how I’d feel about being in a relationship with him and, of course, my non-negotiable criteria. The description was my head and my heart expressing themselves together in 389 words to be exact, and printed out in blue italic Monotype Corsiva font. It was placed right on my desk where I can read it a few times a day until I was living and breathing it. Are We Compatible?
He knew about this juicy little document and listened very intently when I told him about it. After all, he was the man who showed up several days after I clearly put this out to the universe. Being an indulgent listener with easy flowing conversation was written right there in blue and white.
So when I asked him over coffee at LACMA, "I'm just curious. What does compatibility mean to you," this is how he replied.
"Feeling comfortable together and being able to talk easily." 9 words! Count ‘em! I love men! Their answers are so straight-forward and simple. No need to write a flowery page long manifestation, just get down to the basics. Bottom line it. No hesitation and it just rolled off his tongue like a well-prepared elevator pitch.
We started talking more about this whole idea of feeling comfortable.
• Feeling comfortable enough to discuss any subject? Yes.
• Feeling comfortable enough to be playful and flirty? For sure.
• Feeling comfortable enough to be vulnerable and share our deepest feelings? A must.
• Feeling comfortable enough to make me happy. Most definitely.
• Feeling comfortable enough to whittle a spear in his man cave, or retreat and silently worry about his car’s carburetor, knowing that his partner will lovingly give him his space and welcome him back when he’s ready. Absolutely!
In less than 10 words, he summed it all up about what it means to him to be compatible in his ideal relationship.
Don’t you just love the way men can speak up so easily about what they want? All it takes is asking them a simple question in a non-threatening way. Maybe it’s time to have this little eye-opening conversation with your guy and find out what he really thinks is at the heart of compatibility. You may be surprised! Are You Compatible? An 11 Point Checklist Challenge
Passionately Yours,
Deb Dutilh
Relationship and Compatibility Coach
