How To Have Great Sex To Save A Struggling Relationship

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how important is sex in a relationship
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Sex is an amazing tool to bring two people back together if they're in a rut.

Wouldn’t it be nice if there was one thing that could really make a difference in your struggling relationship? One thing that could pull you closer, that could make you laugh again and feel good together? Wouldn’t that just be amazing?

Well, there is one thing: sex.

"Wait," you say. "What? No way. I am not having sex with him."

Yes, you can. And you should! 

How important is sex in a relationship? Here are the 5 ways great sex can save your struggling relationship:

1. Build connection through touch.

Sex between two people who care about each other is about connection — intimate non-verbal connection. In many ways, it's the most important kind of connection because it is purely organic.

When two people are struggling, it can be difficult to connect verbally without making a mess. But the act of holding hands and kissing, of touching and pressing your bodies close together, can allow connection without words. This is a connection that is, in many ways, more effective than talking.

So try it. Try the touching and the kissing and the rolling around. It just might open things up between the two of you in a life changing way.

2. Aim for an orgasm.

Did you know that when you have an orgasm, your body is flooded with dopamine, a chemical that makes you feel like you can take on the world? And the effects of that dopamine lasts for at least 5 hours.

Imagine how it would feel for you and your partner, freshly connected and flooded with dopamine, spending time together. Pretty great, no? Maybe it will help you remember why you fell for each other in the first place!

3. Laugh and have fun.

Sex is fun. It just is. And it's funny.

Think of all of the fumbling and the nakedness and the gymnastics. The rolling around, trying to fit together. Chemicals flowing freely. It’s almost impossible not to smile and laugh and be happy.

And there is no better antidote to a struggling relationship than some happy times together.

So try it. You might find yourselves smiling together. Wouldn’t that be fun?

4. End your disagreements with make-up sex.

So really, is there anything better than make-up sex?

Two people, emotions heightened in conflict, coming together in a powerful way. Clothes flying everywhere. Tables wiped clean of plate ware. Passionate only begins to describe it.

And really, how can you stay mad at each other after such an encounter? You are reconnected, the dopamine is flying, you are laughing so hard your sides hurt, and you certainly are no longer angry.

Try ending your conflicts with a little make-up sex. You might find you move past things just a little more quickly.

5. Have regular, satisfying sex.

This is one that I don’t even want to mention but it's a key piece on how sex keeps a relationship going strong.

Most people don’t go out looking for someone else. Normally, a someone else just appears out of the blue. What you do when that someone else appears depends on just how satisfied you are.

Regular great sex in a relationship generally means that a couple’s sexual needs are being met. And, more often than not, their emotional needs are met as well because the two very often go hand in hand.

And if a couple is satisfied in their relationship, there is no need to go elsewhere, even if the prospect arises.

So have a lot of sex. And keep it in the relationship. Keep temptations at bay.

I know that when relationships are struggling, sex can be the last thing on your mind. The prospect of firing up with someone you can barely look at seems absurd.

But try it. Really try it. Give yourself over to the passion, the connection, the fun and the orgasms, and get back in touch with how you first felt with each other.

Armed with that feeling, you both can take on anything.

Mitzi Bockmann is a New York City-based Certified Life Coach. Looking for more ways for sex to help in your relationship? Contact her for help.

This article was originally published at Let Your Dreams Begin. Reprinted with permission from the author.

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