When I was dating, each man I met seemed to have wonderful qualities. But after a few dates or even a few weeks, something would often emerge that changed my mind. The guy who was spontaneous really had a problem with commitment and the guy who had a really steady job was really a workaholic. It was always such a disappointment. The longer I was single, the more I started to ask the question of how could I ever know who someone was right away?
I figured out that by following a few simple rules, I could get to know a guy before giving my heart away. So if you're looking for a few tried-and-true dating tips that actually work, I sincerely recommend you give these tips some thought.
1. On a first date, meet up in public. On your first date (especially if you've never met them before), meet somewhere neutral and in public. This is mostly for safety. Make sure you have a plan to keep the date short. Arrange to have a friend call your cell phone half an hour after the date begins to check on you and give you the "emergency call out" if things are already uncomfortable. Sometimes, the first impression tells you all you need to determine if there is a connection. Meeting for coffee in a casual cafe works best.
2. Listen to your intuition. Make sure you listen to your gut. What is your first impression? Is he/she being honest? Does he/she seem authentic? You want to go into the date from the viewpoint of analyzing the situation with a critical eye. Physical chemistry isn't everything and besides, the novelty will always wear off over time. It's just one of the important ingredients to a successful relationship.
3. Don't ignore the warning signs — even the small ones! So, assuming that you're attracted to your date, you still need to remain objective enough to get to know who this person is beyond how physically appearance. Dating is meant to be fun and entertaining, but odds are, you're also looking for a commitment. You should learn over time if the person you're with has what you need to be happy. Even if you're still unclear on this after going out on five or six dates with this person, that's okay. This decision evolves over time. The longer you're with someone, the more you know about them. Watch for warning signs and keep these in the back of your mind so you can see how they play out in your relationship over time. And if your date can't get past a few dates without being impolite or inappropriately sexual, it's time to sever the cord and move on. Keep reading ...
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