Some of you might be thinking, “What does this have to do with relationship and dating advice?”. Everything, when we are talking about Love! You see, even though Love is universal and we all know how to do it, we don’t all Love in the same way nor do we behave the same way in relationships. We can learn from other cultures’ new and different ways and make them ours.
So I thought, since I am Italian, I would let you in on the two secrets of how Italians, and in particular Italian women (I am a women after all) Love themselves and others….with style of course! One of the most amazing things about Italians in general is that they love themselves first and foremost and they start by putting a lot of emphasis on the way they present themselves. Not from a conceded place, but from a “gosh, I want to feel good about myself through the way I dress and carry myself” way. Women, in particular, take pride in the way they look and instead of fitting in, they try to stand out as they are fitting in, if that makes sense.
The first step to having love in a relationship is loving oneself and the Italians have that down! You can’t love someone else unless you love yourself first. And that means respecting yourself in relationships, having a voice and not compromising yourself for empty promises, inauthentic declarations and even sex! Italian women are very good at that. They are strong willed, know what they want and go for it, and they definitely know how to speak up, with passion. They are not afraid to express themselves and MUST get their feelings out. The men who fall in love with them, fall in love with that self-expression as that is how she shows she loves herself first and foremost.
Expressing how one feels and having open discussions is a great way to communicate so there are no repressed feelings or resentments. They get it out and move on. As a quick example, I have had many conversations with Italian men where we were just going at it, each one of us telling our side of the story and trying to be right about it, and at the end, it was like it never happened, because having expressed ourselves left us feeling whole and intact even during an argument.
Which brings me to another amazing thing about Italians; how connected they are to their passion. They can be so passionate about something, whether it is about the physical or emotional aspect of a relationship, so much so that sometimes they do get carried away. But it is in the expression of that passion that freedom lies and allows Italians to be the passionate, connected, loving lovers they are known to be. So loving the Italian way can be different and maybe even a little complicated, but if we can learn something from how the Italians do it, it is to connect with our passion and stand for what we want.
Ciao e a presto!
BONUS: Given my background, I wanted to leave the ladies with a few style tips, Italian style:
1. Denim: A wardrobe staple of the ages, jeans are a must for Le Italiane, a good pair of jeans, or several, are usually weathered and used up, or at least they look like it. The fit is one that contours the body and becomes one with it. Believe it or not, Levis are still one of the biggest jean label bought in Italy.
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