Whenever I return from Italy or South America, I am reminded of the importance food plays in intimate relationships. I'm not talking about quick, easy, in-and-out types of meals; instead, I'm talking about lovingly and thoughtfully prepared food. There's a big difference — and taking part in the "good stuff" helps you get more of the good stuff in your relationships (like openness, trust and feelings of comfort), too.
When food is prepared with love it becomes the ultimate extension of a "cuddle" or a "hug." In fact, I feel so strongly about this that I think couples who want to enhance their relationship or reignite a spark in a partnership that has become dulled should turn to their kitchen.
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The greatest thing about adding food to your cuddling time is it adds another diversion to your senses as it helps you stay in the moment with your partner. Most people equate food with love, and when you take your time with preparing food, you put more love into your food. During intimacy, your partner can feel that love. Plus, as an added bonus — it's fun!
How To Create Your Own "Cuddle Plan" With Food:
1. Just as you can cuddle virtually anywhere, you can take food with you to any room in your home, flat or patio. Preparing sensual foods together, such as strawberries dipped in chocolate or finger sandwiches is fun and provides amusement and anticipation. No one likes to cuddle on a hard surface, so make sure you have a "cuddle sofa", or overstuffed chair where you both fit comfortably. A cozy picnic blanket, a bottle of wine and some cheese and crackers can also do the trick!
2. If you'll be tempted by technology, consider shutting off phones, laptops or other electronics. Preparing, sharing and tasting foods and spices should keep you centered in the now, but just in case, make sure your partner knows that your focus is totally on them. Additionally, smoking while cuddling (and eating!) is not wise. Getting burned or the smell of smoke in your face causes coughing and disgust.
3. During food preparation and tasting food, the sounds of laughter, joking and talking are pleasant. This enhances mood, anticipation and sexuality. Don't forget to have fun while cooking and eating — one surefire way to do that is to not take yourself too seriously.
4. We become more engaged with our partner if we feed each other, because we're watch one another's mouths and experiencing their enjoyment. This is hugely important with feeling more connected; you're helping create their excitement!
5. Tasting good food and trying small portions of foods you may not have tried before is novel, exciting, and makes you feel more connected. Sitting close on the patio and watching the sunset while enjoying the taste of a mozzarella with tomatoes and listening to your loved one laugh is not only fun, it heals your body and mind.
6. Intimacy is enhanced when the foods you eat are chosen with care and prepared with love. You cannot get this is a fast food restaurant, and in fact, it is like comparing love making to a "quickie" — the two have no comparison!
How do you share food with your partner? How does cooking and eating enhance your love life? Share a comment below!
More intimacy advice from YourTango:
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- The 7 Best Apps For Enhancing Intimacy
- The Recipe For Intimacy: Revealing & Accepting
- Love: Tips & Expert Advice
Get even more insights about the delicious ways in which food influences our relationships with each other and ourselves by checking out all of our Breakfast, Love & Dinner stories here!