9 Totally Unexpected Facts About Kissing You Never Knew

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Kissing is one of the most intimate acts we perform as human beings. We kiss to demonstrate affection, to demonstrate desire and to increase desire. Darwin wrote about kissing and kissing-like behaviors, including rubbing noses and sniffing the other person.

Usually, we talk about using the lips or face. But according to Darwin, the desire to kiss is innate. We are born with this desire! That's why these nine facts about kissing will get you craving a make out session.

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RELATED: The 4 Types Of Kisses Men Love Most


1. Couples who enjoy kissing (and do it often) have healthier relationships.

Take a moment and think about the last really good kiss that you experienced. Maybe you remember how the other person smelled — how he tasted or how her lips felt. Kissing involves so many of our senses. It gives you the opportunity to move in close to each other in a really intimate way.

I've had many people tell me that problems began in their relationships when they stopped kissing. Kissing allows you to reconnect with your partner. It is fuel for our erotic desires.

2. Your lips can feel pleasure more than your clitoris or your penis.

​There is a plethora of nerve endings in the lips and mouth. Helen Fisher, an anthropologist from Rutgers University, believes that kissing most likely evolved to encourage three essential needs: lust, attraction and attachment. Our libido drives us to find sexual partners, romantic love drives us to commit to a relationship (or multiple relationships) and attachment keeps us together over the long haul.

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Kissing releases oxytocin, which is a hormone that promotes trust, bonding and attachment both in yourself and the person you're with. It increases intimacy, can create sexual arousal and promote orgasm.

3. Deep, passionate kisses kick-start your libido.

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Deep, passionate kisses raise your heart rate and your blood pressure, can increase your life expectancy by lowering stress levels, and burns calories (25 to 26 per one-minute kiss). Sexual kissing where your mouth is open also allows testosterone to be transferred from a man to his partner, and will raise his partner’s sex drive.

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4. Kissing helps us to choose the right mate.

When we kiss, we take in all sorts of physiological information via pheromones and saliva that may well let us know if the person we are kissing is optimally compatible with us or if she is too closely related to us.

5. It boosts your immune system and works out your face.

Kissing (when you are healthy and not sick) can actually boost your immune system. Deep kissing uses all 34 muscles in the face and tightens and strengths your facial muscles, making you look younger. Kissing also boots your dental health because the saliva you produce when kissing helps to fight plaque build up!


RELATED: What Kissing Really Means In A Long-Term Relationship (And Why You Shouldn't Ever Stop)

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6. Kissing can help with pain control.

The endorphins you produce are more than 200 times stronger than pain killers like morphine and Fentanyl. They don’t just lower physical pain perception — they also lower emotional pain perception.

7. Kissing can let you know how satisfied a man is with the relationship.

A study at the Kinsey Institute for sexual research demonstrated that kissing and cuddling were the most important predictors for relationship satisfaction. And a study at University College London found that men who kiss their partners goodbye before leaving the house have fewer car accidents.

8. It makes sex better.

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The Kama Sutra, the famous book relating to love according to Hindu law written in the 3rd Century AD, spends an entire chapter on kissing describing four different types of kissing, when and where on the body to kiss your lover and giving some detailed instructions.

Couples who are having problems with staying aroused during sex benefit from focusing on kissing only. Most couples report intense arousal, difficulty keeping to the exercise and sticking to kissing only, higher levels of connection and intimacy and spending far more time together being erotic when restricted to kissing.

9. It increases your self-confidence.

When you kiss someone, you are telling them that they are valuable to you, attractive to you and that you want to be intimate with them. All of these messages increase your self-confidence and self-esteem. A German study found that men who left home after having a good deep kiss from their wives earned more money. The same hormones (oxytocin and endorphins) can help boost self-esteem and self-confidence. 

As your kissing prowess increases, your confidence increases because you can see that you are creating intense joy in your partner, increasing his desire and increasing his sexual satisfaction.

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RELATED: I Broke Up With Someone Because Our Kissing Style Wasn't Compatible


Dr. Lori Beth Bisbey is a sex and intimacy coach, psychologist, public speaker and author who works with individuals, couples and polyamorous groups during discovery sessions to help them create and sustain healthy exciting relationships.