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Are You Dating A Valentines Day Grinch?

By . Posted on .

devil heart
Happy Valentines Day?
How to get him to amp up the romance this year!

Are you faced with a man that doesn't really see the importance of Valentines Day? Maybe he sees it as an over-commercialized Hallmark holiday that's just placed into the calendar to squeeze money out of men and create high expectations for women. This makes it difficult for you to really ask for what you want on V-day out of fear of being judged. So, what do you do if you are a woman that wants the flowers, chocolates, romantic dinner and the amazing V-day story to tell all your friends the next day?

Well, I've got an answer for you! The biggest mistake that I see women make with men is that they will not say what it is they really want. This leaves the man not knowing what to do, so he reverts back to what he thinks is right. The problem with this is that what he ends up doing may not be what you really want.

More from YourTango: I used to feel alone

So ladies, it's time for you to begin proclaiming what you want! For example, a friend of mine wanted to go to a particular restaurant on her anniversary with her husband, and he had proclaimed that this year he wanted to plan the anniversary. So my friend asked me, "What should I do? I want to give him the space to plan and not take over, but I also really want to go to this restaurant." I said, "Tell him what restaurant you want to go to, and let him plan the rest. Trust me — he will thank you for the clue of what you want."

I checked in with her after her anniversary date, and she said she had one of the most amazing anniversaries "because I told him what I wanted." The same technique will ensure you have the romantic V-day you desire.

Listen: The man wants you to be happy, so if you proclaim what it is that you want and what makes you happy, he will make it happen. So, the trick is saying it in a way that makes sense to him ... like this:

More from YourTango: Your Mom

"Hey [insert pet name or name], I know you don't love V-day, and I totally get it, and I know it is this overly commercialized holiday (or whatever he calls it; use his words), but what would make me the happiest girl is to celebrate our relationship in some way on that day. Can we [insert what you want], and maybe you could surprise me with something special that day? Again, I know you hate that day, but it would mean so much to me if we celebrated it in some way that day." Keep reading ...

More Valentines Day advice from YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Kavita Patel

Author

Kavita J. Patel 

The SECRET to having an OUTRAGEOUSLY HAPPY RELATIONSHIP that NOBODY tells you about. 

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Kavita Patel:

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This past week was my mom and my father in law’s birthdays and Hemal’s (my husband for those that are new) is on Sunday, so it is definitely a week of celebration for me!   On my mom’s birthday, I posted the following on Facebook: “Today is my Mom's birthday! She is an amazingly dedicated, loyal, beautiful, ... Read more

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For Valentine’s Day, Hemal was out of town. He travels off to Toronto every week for work. He flew in last Friday, the day after V-day, and he had bought tickets to see the Broadway musical, Wicked. It was off the hook! I loved the musical. All I had to say is “we aren’t doing anything romantic” and boom! He is booking tickets! Yes, I ... Read more

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