Want to be an amazing girlfriend? Of course you do. Here are 5 simple and easy ways to make it happen.
1. Be present with him.
When you are with your boyfriend, be with him. Turn your phone off. Put it in your purse, or put it in a drawer, but put it away. Whatever happens "on your phone" can wait. We will all survive without incessant Facebook status updates. If you want to cultivate a deep connection with your partner, then you have to be present with him.
Look him in the eyes and make him feel like you would rather be nowhere else. I know a lot of people think they can do many things at once; in other words, multitask. Not true. When we do one thing at a time, we do it well. When we attempt to multitask, we do many things poorly. If you multitask your relationship you might find yourself multitasking being single, because what a man wants is your attention. Your phone will be there when you are done, but if you keep texting while spending time together, you might wind up texting alone.
2. Love something he loves.
If your boyfriend is passionate, and I assume he is, then love something he loves. Think of all the things he's passionate about, pick one, and share it as a common interest. Learn a bit about that passion and collaborate with him on it. This can be something you both have in common, and something you can both talk about. Preferably it shouldn't be about sports or a TV show, because those generic things don't reveal his true character. Find out what he loves. What is in his heart? Have that in common. Relationships succeed through synergy, not separate lives. If you can't find something to love that he is also passionate about, then why are you with him?
3. Put the "friend" in girlfriend.
Men want a best friend companion with whom they also roll around naked with from time to time. Sound simple? That's what we want. We want someone who is down for our interests, small talk, and humor, but can also fulfill our carnal base needs. Men are simple... very simple. Talk to us like a friend, be playful and fun, and don't overcomplicate things as we aren't very complicated people. Have the potential to be his best friend, and show him this potential. He'll keep you around if you do.
4. Don't nag about small things.
We often fight and create unnecessary drama because we focus on the negative in someone. If we focus on the negative, we will see the negative. We will see whatever we make our minds up to see. If your boyfriend sucks at doing the laundry, maybe you should do it. Don't let it create a fight. If something bothers you deeply, then you are probably more passionate about doing it, so do it and let him do something else. Maybe he'll clean the dishes instead. Instead of letting something build as a resentment, which causes drama, try to not focus on the things you don't like and embrace the things you do.
5. Avoid collaboration on social networks.
Unfriend each other on Facebook, Google Plus, etc. You are friends and lovers in real life, so you don't need to focus on what each other is doing in the "virtual world". Who cares? It's only going to cause fights. Why? Because as humans, we are always looking for something to fight about. "Who is that girl in the picture?" or "So that's who he was with last night!" Just remove that stress and drama. Trust your boyfriend until he proves otherwise — simple as that. And if he proves otherwise then you don't need Facebook to tell you to break up with him.
I hope you liked these 5 insights for being a better mate. I talk about many other dating philosophies in m book "Pray Your Kids Are Ugly" — thoughts of Online Dating and the Future of Human Interactions. Please take the time and check it out here.
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