It's easier than you think ....
A CEO of a top law firm hates his life and is thinking about having an affair with one of his clients. A SAHM drinks wine before noon each day to make it through. A tradesman takes a three-year sabbatical but now fears returning to work.
Do you know what they all have in common? They despise their life and have no clue how to change it. Have you ever felt stuck? Like no matter how you tried to spin it, something always popped up, blocking you into your little box, causing you to remain the same? Well you’re not alone 2/3 of Americans claim they’re not very happy or satisfied with their lives.
In counseling, the story is the same for the lawyer, SAHM, and the tradesman. They admit to themselves that they’re not happy, not following their passions, and fear change.
So what do I do with this?
First, I teach them the three keys that are essential to anyone that wants to have a successful life—slow down, simplify, and savor. The first step, slowing down, is embedded naturally in the therapeutic process, when you pause and give your life focused attention, you’ll be amazed by what rises to the surface. In the beginning you’ll feel the same—overwhelmed, under appreciated, and stuck. But if you stay with the moment, solutions will begin to pop up in the crevasses of your mind—doors that can lead you out of this mess.
Okay, then what?
In order for the clients [you] to have time to explore the solutions that could improve their lives, they must simplify their states of existence. Everyone, and you can agree, is strapped for time. That’s why no one believes change is possible. When could they fit in yet another task! However, when you slow down, examine your world, and see the possibilities, you have the motivation to make some changes. Whether it means dropping some social commitments, cleaning out your house so the stuff is manageable, set up a carpooling system with other parents, or decrease your total costs per month. These simple steps free up more time to explore how you truly want your life to look.
For example, the CEO saw that he could work remotely from home two days a week, freeing up six hours of drive time, and as a side benefit he became more efficient with his tasks without the interruptions from his job—which freed up more time. The SAHM hired a nanny to come in and relieve her for four hours per week, so that she could get to know who she was, at this stage in her life. She found a coffee shop that not only filled her cup of joe but also reminded her how much she missed painting—she now works part-time as an artist. The tradesman chose to start back at work, on part-time bases in order to maintain his yoga and mindfulness practice. This prevented him from getting sucked into the demands of work and allowed him to follow his true passion, interior design.
Once you slow down and decide where to trim the excess you need to ask yourself two important questions:
- If you knew that you were going to die in three years, what changes would you make?
- If you could not fail, what would you do with your life?
Got it. Now what?
Now, you implement an action plan to get started. Simply list out your goals of what you want to become, achieve, or obtain, and list out three steps you can take to get you closer to actualizing your dreams. The three steps need to be done in consecutive order: today, tomorrow, and the day after.
Once the plan is set in motion you merely have to bend your head down and keep moving with it. The last key to experiencing a happier life is to savor. As you move along in your evolution, take time to savor the little moments. Become extra mindful of your autopilot mode and whenever you drift off, hit the override button and remain present.
If you learned anything from this article SHARE IT!
For more guidance on how to create a life worth living visit, www.southmetrocounseling.com and complete the free assessment. To learn more about the three keys to having a successful life and improving your relationship, get Back 2 Love, a book created for those that crave more.