5 Ways To Give Your Core Love Again

On my radio show last week, a woman called in and asked "How can I know what is the right way to move forward?" Which argument from her mind can she trust when she can make so many different arguments to go in one direction or another?

This is such a good question! Our minds can confuse us to no end. So, how can we find our way out of this confusion into clarity about how to move forward?

We need to learn to live from our core.

One way to define the core (a term that comes from Core Energetics) is that it is the deepest part of ourselves that we have access to. In Core Energetics, they teach that there are three aspects of the self: the mask, lower self and core self. The mask is our persona. The face we put on for the world so that we can get along.

Our lower self is the part of us that runs on animal instinct. This is fight, flight or freeze. It is about survival in a primal sense. Our core self on the other hand is best understood as transcendent love, as our deepest truth and highest human ideals.

When you are more connected to your core, your path forward seems clearer, you feel happier and more at peace, and you are able to have a more positive impact. Think about it this way. Would you rather make your decision from a place where you are doing what you think you should or have to do, where you are angry or fearful, or where you are in contact with the highest truest part of yourself?

That kind of breaks it down, right?

So, lets look at some ways that you can connect in with the core of who you are:

1. Challenge your Mask: Most of the time we walk around in the superficial part of ourselves—the mask. In fact, many people don’t even know that is where they are living from. You can challenge you mask by asking if what you are thinking or feeling is actually true or if it might be able to be viewed from a different perspective. The work of Byron Katie does a wonderful job of challenging the mask and reconnecting people with a deeper part of themselves.

2. Do things you love: It is a very simple fact that if you do more things you love you feel happier, more fulfilled and more at peace. The trick is to know if you REALLY love what you are doing or if you have just adopted it because it is socially acceptable. So, pay attention. Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi talks about this in his book Flow. This book states that when we are doing things we truly love we experience things like time disappearing because we are so engrossed in what we are doing.

3. Get inspired: From a beautiful painting to a sublime piece of music, we connect with our core when we're inspired. This effortless way of returning to our core can be used frequently through our days and weeks to nurture this connection.

4. Know your values: When we are in integrity with ourselves, we're more connected to the core of who we are. One of the things that I teach in my programs is that there are no methods or rules that guarantee a person fulfillment and success because each one of us needs to create a life and or business that's in alignment with who we are at a deep level and our values help us do this.

5. Return to love: The most challenging and most profoundly life-changing strategy for connecting with your core is simply returning to love when you have left it behind. This requires that you're experienced enough with feeling deep love and that you are aware enough to switch gears at will. This is also a central teaching in my work. I believe that as people learn to do this their life becomes infinitely better.