Don't be fooled by love.
As April approaches, do you think back to when you were a kid and you played tricks on April Fool's Day? If you were the one playing the trick, it was likely great fun, but if you were the one on the receiving end ... not so much. Well, now you're an adult and you certainly don't want to be made a fool of. Yet, as you start to get involved with someone, it's a real possibility that the person you're seeing is really not the person with whom you're meant to spend the rest of your life.
Here's the dilemma: You meet, you get along, he's charming as well as bright and attractive. Why not continue to go out? So you do. Little by little, you start to invest more time in each other and the feelings also start to grow. And then it happens. Without even realizing it, you've got the "love goggles" on, which basically means that you aren't thinking clearly any more. Everyone else seems to see the character flaws in your "Mr. Right," though his weaknesses and problematic areas seem to escape you.
You continue to get more involved and more deeply committed. He continues to be who he is. And then, his unappealing traits start to be obvious even to you; even through the "love goggles." Are you, indeed a fool?
In fact, there are lots of signs that people give off right from the very beginning. The trick is to be mindful and pay attention to those signs. As a relationship expert, I've created a list to help you know the signs to watch out for:
1. How does he treat his mother? And how does he speak about her? The relationship a guy has with his mother will tell you a great deal about how he'll relate to you so pay attention.
2. What is the manner in which he relates to wait staff? Though this seems like a small insignificant piece, it's really about respect. If he's the kind of person who talks down to wait staff, eventually, it will be your turn.
3. Does he call when he says he will and show up at the time he's supposed to? It's important to be consistent. Trust is a foundational factor in a good relationship. Consistency is certainly a way of showing one's trustworthiness. Keep reading ...
More relationship advice from YourTango:
- Hard Work Ahead: Are Relationships Really Worthwhile?
- In A Long-Distance Relationship? Tips To Keep The Love Strong
- THIS Is The Kiss Of Death For Relationships