It's all up to you ...
Let’s see. You’ve been dating for a while now and you are really into him.
You know, without a doubt, that he is "the one" — and you just wish he would commit so you can stop worrying and get on with your beautiful life together.
You just want to feel more secure!
This might even be a reoccurring pattern for you. You’re probably asking yourself, why do I attract all the commitment-phobes?!
Well darling, I have some insight — and it might shock you.
Are you ready for this?
Something inside of YOU is afraid of commitment.
Of course you do! That is your conscious desire.
But there is another 90-95% of your mind, your subconscious mind that is weighing in here and affecting your reality. It is very likely that somewhere in your subconscious mind you do, in fact, have some form of a fear around commitment.
Relationships are mirrors. They reflect back to us what is hidden within us.
Plus, whatever is within us serves as an energetic magnet to attract the exact same thing right back. So if your partner is afraid to commit, there is something inside of you that is also afraid.
The great news is ... there is something you can do about it!
You already know you can’t change him, so the only option you have here is to change whatever is within your subconscious mind that is holding you back. Trust me. It is crazy cool watching your outside reality change when you work on what’s happening inside of you.
Here are two easy things you can do to increase your own comfort with commitment:
1. Uncover what is going on behind your own fear.
It’s obvious that our fears scare us and that is precisely why we bury them in our subconscious. But if you are reading this now, you are ready to deal with any fears that are holding you back from being in a committed and loving relationship.
I want you to ask yourself the questions outlined below. Maybe even take out your journal and do some free writing in response to them. It might take a week or two for the answers to be clear, but by intentionally asking, the truth will be drawn out into your conscious mind.
Here are some questions to ponder:
- Why might I be afraid of commitment?
- Have I ever felt abandoned in the past through death, divorce or a breakup?
- Am I afraid that I will not be able to create a successful relationship?
- Am I afraid of being stuck in another relationship that doesn’t serve me or my highest potential?
2. Work to create solid foundations in your life.
In order for your partner to reflect commitment back to you, we need to shift your energy to a solid, committed foundation. We will do that by balancing your base energy center, your root chakra.
Fear is the emotion that causes the most imbalance in this chakra. So those fears you have been experiencing — fear that you will be alone forever, fear that you don’t deserve him, fear that you will not have the life you had hoped for — are causing a root chakra imbalance, which means you are currently unable to establish security in your life and relationship.
Let’s get you out of that crazy fear cycle and into a more grounded and secure space.
Try doing a few of these simple strategies to ground yourself:
- Connect with nature: Get outside and go for a walk at the beach or in a forested area. Breathe in the fresh smell of nature. Take your shoes off and connect with the earth, or wrap your arms around a tree and notice how your body feels.
- Eat the right nutritional sources: To balance the root chakra, it is recommended that you eat protein and root vegetables. Think beats, turnips, carrots, maca, red meat, kidney beans, eggs, oysters, or Greek yogurt.
- Wear red: Every color carries a vibration, and the color vibration that assists in bringing balance to the root chakra is red. Wear red and surround yourself with things that are red, or treat yourself to some red flowers.
The most effective way to achieve our relationship desires is to give ourselves what we desire from our partner.
Right now it is critical that you commit to yourself.
Commit to these suggestions, appointments you make, your workout schedule, and any other commitments you might have to yourself.
If you do, I am confident things will begin to change quickly for you in a very positive way.
Diane Taylor is an intuitive love & relationship coach with a passion for helping people discover and unlock what's holding them back from finding and keeping the love they desire. Do you know what is holding you back? Take the Your Key To Unlocking Love quiz and find out now!