Unlucky In Love? Why You Shouldn't Shut The Door

By

Unlucky In Love? Why You Shouldn't Shut The Door [EXPERT]
Feeling impatient and wanting to give up? Find out how to keep the hope alive.

Life was so simple when you were young and not so hyper-focused on attracting a relationship. You enjoyed dating and just assumed Mr. Right would show up when the stars were aligned. After playing in the dating pool, you made a decision that you were ready for love and the lightness seemed to change. The search for the one became a serious mission and a process of dating drudgery. When Love Manifestation Turns Into Mani-Frustration

Along the journey from single to relationship there are ups and downs. You revel in the excitement of meeting someone new, and then feel the despair of the person blowing you off or saying they aren't ready for a commitment. This also happens when you set yourself on a personal development path with great enthusiasm knowing that you have the power to change your love life. Diving into the latest technique, you get enthusiastic believing if you could just visualize your goal everything will fall into place. As time wears on and no dates are in sight, you then start to get down on yourself as though nothing will ever change.

Whether you are starting a new business or setting the course for true love, the path isn't always simple and clean. Along the way there are setbacks, disappointments, and fears to face. Often when people are presented with those obstacles, they get discouraged and start to shut down. Closing the mental door to the possibility of success, they get sidetracked from their vision and start to have more faith in failure than their dreams. 4 Steps To Finding Love [VIDEO]

When you close the doors and shut down, it is your ego's way of staying in control. You believe that what is out there is more powerful than you. You feel dwarfed by the external results and the ability to control your destiny. If you hold this energy it doesn't match what you want, it matches what you don't want. You continue to create more of what you don't want and spiral down in the wrong mental direction.

The most powerful thing you can do in these times of desperation is to keep opening the door to the possibility. Stop going in reverse, closing down, and shift into the energy of opening up to move you forward. Even when everything out there is showing you the opposite, you must hold the vision of what you want. You must keep opening up to receive. Do You Know What Roadblocks Are In Your Life?

Some people have lived decades in patterns of behavior that has led to their lack of love or money. A few weeks of positive thinking may not be enough to turn the tide. You may have to use extreme mental force to resist the temptation of shutting down and giving up in the beginning of your journey. When you force that door open in your mind consistently, you will start to see new opportunities flowing to you. This becomes easier with practice and eventually your new habit of being. 

You see this happening with small things like when you wake up in a good mood and get green lights all the way to your destination. If you are in your own business you see the sales ebb and flow with your energy. I also don't have to remind you of the familiar feast or famine syndrome in dating you probably know very well. Everything follows a specific energy and that energy is directed by you. 3 Reasons Why You Can't Find A Guy

Keep reading...

More Juicy Content From YourTango:
10 Ways Men Show Affection
5 Ways To Be On Cloud 9 About Your Love Life!
25 Ways To Uniquely Say 'I Love You'

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Debi Berndt

Author

Debi Berndt is the co-founder of CreativeLove.com, a personal development system for singles to stop fixing themselves and finally find true love. She works with her partner, Dr. Robert Maldonado (Psychologist). Their system was developed based on Carl Jung's work and influenced by Eastern Philosophy.  Debi is also the author of the bestselling book, LET LOVE IN. Get your free lecture and meditation - Why you are single and how to find love without fixing yourself here.

Location: Santa Monica, CA
Credentials: CHT
Other Articles/News by Debi Berndt:

Afraid You'll Never Find Love? Get Over It

By

Do you feel that no matter what you do, nothing seems to work out for you in your love life? The years are passing and you fear that you will be spending the rest of your life alone. Sometimes the fear is so great that you break down and get triggered after a bad date or someone you liked fell away. Your fearful ego is driving your efforts and, instead of ... Read more

Always Getting Rejected? 3 Ways To Love Yourself Anyway

By

You hear people tell you, "you have to love yourself first," before someone will love you. This common self-help quote didn't help me much. I tried to love myself. I took confidence workshops and I said my affirmations, but when someone I liked stopped calling, my positive thoughts turned into self-hate again. I thought, "What is wrong with ... Read more

Pop Your Comfort Bubble & Open Up To Love

By

Are you afraid of being alone and single? Do you wonder if the search for true love will ever be over? Do you obsess over the idea, "what if I never meet anyone?" Most singles say being alone scares them and they fear never meeting that special person. The unconscious mind, however, is always moving you away from what you fear and trying to keep you ... Read more

See More

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.