So you think you don’t “need” a man?


So you think you don’t “need” a man?
Beware of “judging” too soon...a lesson from Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor

If you happened to click on this article because you had a suspicion it was going to irritate you, let me start by sharing this widely-accepted notion. “The truth will set you free – but occasionally, it may really aggravate you first...”

I think we all intuitively “get” that there are many good reasons why you might not want to feel like you “need” your partner. The truth is – life, by its very nature, is uncertain so there is some comfort to be found in not getting too “attached” to things you can’t control. In fact, it’s easy to make the case that it’s actually smart (which explains why the people who do this most often are usually highly intelligent and successful). However, I suggest there may be another very different – and far more empowering – way of looking at that. In order to illustrate that, I want to share a thought-provoking, real-life story.


A Judge of Character

Recently, I saw an excellent interview that Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor did with Oprah. Clearly, she is a brilliant and very hard-working woman of superior intellect, dedication and compassion. While I’m not here to “judge” her in any way, I do think her interview featured what our President would call a critically important “teachable moment” and I want to use it to serve others. Who knows, maybe it will even get back to her I offer this perspective with deep respect, admiration and appreciation for her.

For those who don’t know, Justice Sotomayor married her high school sweetheart who she described as very generous, kind and loving. Despite her obvious love and appreciation for this man (which you can see for yourself in the clip below), they divorced seven years into the relationship – yet still remain close today. So it begs the question – with so much love and appreciation still evident decades later – how did it all go wrong? And why has the Justice never remarried?

Justice Sotomayor was so beautifully introspective and vulnerable as she took full responsibility and admitted that she was completely consumed with her work as an up-and-coming attorney. As she says in her own words essentially, one day, her husband realized that no matter how hard he worked, he would never be as successful as her...and his inescapable conclusion was – “does she really even need me?” As painful as that realization was for him, her response was even more it would be to any man. She said, “I loved him & I knew he loved me. But did I need him in the way that he wanted me to need him? He was probably right...that I didn’t...”

See the video clip for yourself:

An Open-And-Shut Case? Not Exactly...

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dave Elliott

Dating Coach

Dave Elliott is a Relationship Expert and Coach who works with clients all over the world. If you're serious about attracting, creating or maintaining the fulfilling relationship of your dreams, contact Dave for a free consultation or check out his work online. He is the founder of Legendary Love For Life and the creator of The ManMagnetics Formula.™

Location: Baltimore, MD
Credentials: EFT
Other Articles/News by Dave Elliott:

WARNING: Never Make Him Choose Between You And The Big Game


As the NFL season winds to a close and the Playoffs and SuperBowl are now upon us, I wanted to share a situation that recently almost tragically derailed my client's budding relationship.  The problem was she didn't understand when her guy "seemingly" chose watching the big game over coming to her house for dinner. Now before you dive ... Read more

The Heartbreaking Truth Behind Every Pretty Face You See


Judging by the insatiable demand for celebrity news that seemingly worships the young and glamourous and the sheer volume of money spent on cosmetics, plastic surgery, fitness and other age-defying technologies, you'd think being incredibly fit and attractive is great. But what if that’s not always the case? A Powerful Perspective ... Read more

Finally! The Truth About Why Smart Women Pick Bad Boys


In my work as a relationship coach and blogger, I hear it over and over again — yet, at some level, it still takes me by surprise — "Why do so many really smart, accomplished and attractive women go for 'bad boys' or Alpha males?" In other words, why does someone who has the potential to be an incredible catch sabotage herself with ... Read more

See More

Latest Expert Videos
Must-see Videos
Most Popular