ProConnect

Why You Should Date More Than One Guy At A Time

By

Why You Should Date More Than One Guy At A Time [EXPERT]
How many men are you dating?
One expert's opinion about finding love while dating multiple men ... all at once.

So many of my clients ask me whether they should date more than one man at a time. As their search for love heats up, suddenly there are a few guys who are interested and they don't know how to handle it. The other scenario is that they fall in love too quickly with one guy and end up heartbroken time after time. Have either of these situations happened to you?

When I was looking for love, I often dated up to three guys simultaneously. I wasn't trying to hit some number in the Guinness Book of World Records. Rather, my goal was simple: to find a guy I could date more than three times, hoping this would lead to a relationship. 

Frequently, men would drop out after one, two or three dates. Since there was no way to know who would stick around, I dated as many guys as I was interested in at the same time. That's why I'm an advocate for "volume dating." I dated 30 men in 15 months in order to eventually meet my husband.

More from YourTango: Don’t Let Love Passover You This Spring

This is very different than dating more than one person long-term. Let me explain what I mean by "dating." From my perspective as a dating coach, dating is only the first four to ten dates. Once you have an unspoken date on Saturday night, you have moved into the first phase of a relationship.

I point this out because within the first few dates with one man, you shouldn't allow yourself to feel so emotionally attached that seeing someone else would be a problem. Remember, until you're in an exclusive relationship where this has been discussed and agreed on, you are free to seek out other partners. So, I want to be clear — a few dates is not by any means a relationship.

More from YourTango: Falling Into The Trap: Are You A Fool For Love?

The problem comes in when women feel prematurely attached which keeps them from being willing to date other guys. This limits your options before you know you are on the right path. That's how heartbreak happens — when you think you've found "the one" after two dates, and then he never calls again. Playing The Field: The Pros & Cons Of Dating Around

More dating advice from YourTango:

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by

Coach Ronnie Ann Ryan

Dating Coach

The Dating Coach for Women Over 40

Get my free ebook 5 Big Turnoffs that Drive Men Away here.
Author of MANifesting Mr. Right, Why Can't I Find Love and How to Sizzle Vs. Fizzle Online

Location: Milford, CT
Credentials: MBA
Specialties: Dating/Being Single Support
Other Articles/News by Coach Ronnie Ann Ryan:

Don’t Let Love Passover You This Spring

By

In the Jewish faith, Passover is a time of great celebration as people come together to remember being freed from slavery in ancient Egypt. If you're Jewish and single, this is a great opportunity to meet new people because religious holidays provide the chance to socialize. And any social outing helps you expand the number of people you know. As a ... Read more

Falling Into The Trap: Are You A Fool For Love?

By

It happens to everyone at some point — you do things for love that you know are not so smart. You become a fool for love.   Have you done any of the following and fallen into this trap? You believed a guy who told you a lie and you sort of knew it, but chose to ignore it You gave and gave and gave and got so little in ... Read more

Think Again: Why You Shouldn't Ask Him Out

By

There's this man you know who flirts with you often. Maybe every time you see him. You can tell he likes you. So how come he doesn't ask you out? This makes you wonder if you should take the bull by the horns and simply ask him out. There is equality between the genders today so why not right? Disclaimer: While the idea of asking a man out seems ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Smooches

She's That Into You: Cracking the Code of Women

Women give off signals telling you how they feel.

Girlfriends

6 Texting Shockers You Must Avoid!

Sending your man a text message sounds easy enough, but get it wrong and it could be the end of you.

Blues

The addiction to "busy"ness: How to live with more intention

Is the daily routine of life getting you down? Find your passion and live a more authentic life!

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS