You’re probably aware that there are a host of articles, blogs and books on hot, sexy ways to turn on your lover with words and voice tone, including my own recent YourTango articles; “The Power of Pillow Talk” and "4 Quick Tips for a Sexier Voice". However, the other side of this equation is rarely addressed: the role of the listener.
What is sensual listening? As I describe in my book THE FINE ART OF EROTIC TALK, “While taking a warm shower have you ever closed your eyes and just concentrated on the feel of the soothing water on your skin? “ Sensual listening involves a similar relaxed, yet focused mindset. As your lover verbally expresses his or her attraction, desire or love for you, you bring your attention to the manner in which his/her words and voice affect your body, your heart and your soul.” In such a state, such words can begin to feel like erotic caresses. Whether you find such a state of aural awareness easy or difficult to access, the following exercise should help you fine tune this skill.
Exercise: WHOLE BODY LISTENING
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(For this exercise it will be helpful to have a favorite erotic novel, sensual poem or sultry song. If you have nothing available, you may use the erotic poetry in my recent blogs: Erotic Troubadours, Part 1 and Part 2. (Click on links.) Or you may wish to read from my e-manual, Your Daily Verbal Aphrodisiac: Sensual Suggestions and Romantic Enticements.
Sit across from your lover on a comfortable chair, back jack or pillow, allowing yourself to sink into its support. Then bring your awareness into the areas of your body that need release. As you do so, maintain the attitude of a curious explorer in a new land, simply noticing what’s there without attempting to alter it in any way. When your lover begins to speak to you, listen to your lover’s voice with that same attitude of discovery.
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When you feel centered and ready, ask your partner to read to you from the piece of literature that you’ve prepared for this experience, or, if it feels comfortable, to sing to you – from a grounded place deep within his or her body. Close your eyes and allow those words and sounds to flow over your skin like warm, silky massage lotion, onto the surface of your tongue like rich, melted chocolate, and through your body like sweet, warm honey.
Be aware of the kinds of physical and emotional responses these words and sounds arouse within you. You may feel a rush of warmth in your heart, a delicious tingle in your genitals or a flood of joy through your solar plexus.. And notice if these sensations move from one area to another, or radiate throughout your entire body. Whatever form they take, relax and enjoy them.