Dating as a divorcee is different from when you were last "out there." Proceed with caution!
Freedom! That's what you're probably thinking your first night out with your single friends. Then, reality hits. It's been ages since you've last dated, you don't feel like you know what to do, and you feel awkward.
It is important to first recognize whether or not you are truly ready before you start dating again. Certain opinions and preconceptions on your part may come out during conversations, and nothing drives other people away more than a killjoy, cynical person.
Stay Away From Clubs!!!
If you want to meet someone to establish a real meaningful relationship, clubs probably aren't a very good idea. Aside from the fact that it's difficult to talk due to loud music, both men and women (especially men) who go to clubs are on the prowl. They are playing the "be what the other wants you to be game." It's challenging enough that you might still be carrying around baggage from your marriage and divorce; don't make it even more challenging on yourself by adding more.
The Best Bet
Probably the most reliable and safest way of meeting someone is through friends. Friends can set you up with people who they think might have something in common with you, and who you might like in return. Get your friends to set up a group date, that way you won't feel obligated to date the other person in case you don't have anything in common.
You may want to also consider becoming more active in your community by participating in and engaging in volunteer work. When you present yourself to help the community, you tend to lean towards programs that are of the utmost interest or are similar to your hobbies. There you will meet people who are probably on the same wavelength as you are. The amazing thing about this idea is that no matter what happens, you take away fun and happiness with the experience of camaraderie. Meeting someone is just a bonus.
The information superhighway is inundated with numerous websites for internet dating. Some of these sites are quite dependable. Surely you can find somebody who has a lot in common with you in the millions of members internet dating companies attract.
Internet dating is a good prospect because it eliminates the hassles of having to go out of your house before finding someone. However, you have to beware. If an internet dating company does not have stringent rules, people who sign up might be fraudsters. Others also misrepresent themselves. That is the downside of the internet because anyone can pretend to be somebody else. They can upload photos of another person to make them look more attractive.
Be wary of dating a coworker. Many lawsuits filed stem from office romance. You have to be careful, or you can end up being the target of a harassment lawsuit.
Attitude Is Everything!
Be upbeat and have fun in your approach to dating. Do not put too much pressure on yourself. Dwelling on your ex and what they think will only make easing into the dating scene all the more challenging for yourself. If your biggest concern is your kids, explain to them how you are not replacing their other parent. They will also not lose you just because you found someone to be with. Instead of losing you, they are actually gaining a friend. It is imperative that your new friend should accept the idea that you have children and your children realize that you need someone to be fulfilled.