OMG! Donald Trump Wrote A Sex Book And It’s Kinky As HELL

Photo: Amazon 
donald trump wrote s&m romance novel
Sex

Look out, Fabio.

When president-elect Donald Trump takes office in January he will be our first president with no experience in government. 

But the firsts don’t stop there! 

Trump will also be our first president who has written a kinky, 50 Shades of Grey-style, romance novel heavy on the penis and vagina talk.

That’s right, somehow in the furor of the election, Trump’s 2012 novel Trump Tower (ghost written by Jeffrey Robinson) was basically overlooked. 

The book tells the story of the kinky sex lives of the people who live and work inside Trump Tower. 

Amazon

How this happened is beyond me. The book is apparently rife with kinky, BDSM antics that Trump found so titillating he decided to write the only blurb reviewing the book. 

But EL James Trump is not.

Take this hot and heavy (boob heavy), passage from the book (which you can conveniently buy at the Trump Tower bookshop): 

“After the woman fell asleep, Mikey came out, looked around and saw there were at least six women not wearing tops. He proclaimed, ‘I’m dead. I’ve gone to boob heaven.'” 

Stephen Colbert covered the book on his show just before the election, and said that rather than calling it Trump Tower they should have just called the book “Symbolic Penis”. 

He is not wrong. 

The book might present a kinky escape for the male of the species, but if you don’t have a penis, this probably isn’t the type of sexy story you're looking for.

In one of the first chapters a woman living in Trump Tower is held against her will. The scene is supposed to be sexy. 

It’s supposed to portray hot, kinky, BDSM sex in all its glory. But it falls short of the mark once it becomes clear that woman involved did not consent to anything that is happening to her. 

Donald Trump may have praised the book when it was first released, but he’s taken pains to distance himself from it.

In the second edition, the ghost writer’s name is the only one that appears as an author.

Amazon

It’s clear someone tipped off Trump to the idea that American might not want to elect a writer of erotic stories into the highest office in the land.

Little did he know that there was almost nothing he couldn’t do and still get elected into office. 

Trump’s name may no longer grace the cover of Trump Tower, *the sexiest place to live in the country if the book is to be believed) but his name is still on that symbolic penis, and there’s not a lot he can do about that. 

Maybe the White House will inspire him. I don’t know about you, but I’d love to read the erotic stories inspired by the Lincoln bedroom and the oval office. Fingers crossed that the muse strikes! 

 

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