How To REALLY Know If A Guy Likes You (Without Him Saying A Word)

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how to tell if a shy guy likes you

It's more than words....

So you want to know how to tell if a guy likes you? Welcome to the club.

I am 33 years old and when it comes to figuring out if a guy likes me, I've definitely considered sending a guy a note asking him to check yes or no. I mean, that at least would cut straight to the chase, no? We had something right in second grade. 

The truth of the matter is that if a guy likes you, it's actually fairly obvious. He might be too shy to come outright and say it to you, but he is probably still showing you that he likes you in a million tiny ways. 

He will express it one way or another, be it using body language, in the way he interacts with you, or how much his friends know about you.

These eight guidelines should be pretty helpful getting you to suss out whether a man really likes you, if you're still uncertain. 


1. He talks about you 

When you like a guy, you can't shut up about him, and with dudes believe it or not, it's the same deal.

If he likes you, he's going to tell his friends about you, stat. If you've been on a few dates with a guy and he hasn't mentioned his friends, that means he hasn't told his friends about you. If a guy seriously likes you, he's going to want to make you a part of his social circle sooner rather than later. If his buddies don't greet you with a smile and a "I've heard so much about you", then he hasn't been talking about you, and he ain't that into you. 


2. He wants to be around you

This might seem like a no brainer, but even smarty pants folks like me could use a reminder. If a guy likes you, he's going to move heaven and earth to see you. Well, not heaven and earth, but he'll happily get off his couch and come meet you for a cocktail, because hanging out with you makes him happy. If getting him to meet you just once a week is like pulling teeth, he doesn't like you. He may think you're cool, he may WANT to like you, but you aren't a priority for him, end of story. 


3. He makes memories with you

I'm not talking about him remembering the third day anniversary of the first time you kissed his left ear, I'm talking about the big stuff, like your birthday, or you actual anniversary.

Having a bad memory is no excuse. My boyfriend has the worst memory of any human being I have ever met, but he doesn't forget me because he's got this thing called a calendar. If a guy likes you, he makes an effort to remember things about YOU, even if that means doing something as unthinkable as writing shit down. 



4. He cares about your feelings

When a guy cares about you, he doesn't just care about you when you're happy, he cares when you're hurt, or sad, or angry or frustrated, too.

When a man is truly interested in a woman he quickly begins to become invested in her personal life. He won't ever brush aside something that hurts you, he'll ask if you're okay, he'll check in with you often. If a guy seems to run a hundred miles whenever you express a feeling, he doesn't really like you, as tough as that may be to accept. 


5. He is interested in you 

When a guy's really interested in you, he's just that — interested. This goes beyond feigning interest and waiting for his turn to talk, when a man is really interested in you he will listen to the things you say because learning all about you matters to him.

If he spaces out when you talk, or you find yourself reminding him of the same information over and over again, he isn't really listening to you. And if he isn't really listening to you then he doesn't really like you, at least not the way you deserve to be liked. 


6. He protects you 

There's a difference between protecting a woman and being and aggressive dick who picks fights with anyone who even LOOKS at you. That's not normal behavior.

Getting angry on your behalf when someone hurts your feelings, taking care of you when you're sick, that's being protective. If a guy likes you he's going to do whatever he can to make sure you stay safe from harm.

True story, I recently fell and hit my head. I told my boyfriend about it over the phone and he insisted I go see the doctor. He was right, I had a concussion and needed some medical attention. 



7. His body language shows he's intrigued 

If you've been spending time with a man and you still don't know whether or not he likes you, try and start paying more attention to his body language.

When a guy likes you he'll express it with his body, demonstrating intrigue by always turning his whole body towards her, laughing at her jokes and being unable to pull his eyes away from her. It might sounds like a Calvin Klein ad IRL, but I have completely found that this body language sign is 100% reliable. 


8. He'll tell you about his life 

I was once dating a man and thought it was going very well. We had fun together, he was funny and smart and charming (in his way). But after a couple of months I began to feel like something wasn't quite right.

It was then I realized that I knew almost nothing about his past, his childhood, any of it. He was more than willing to talk about his job and his dreams for the future, but the past was a no-go.

When a guy likes you he's going to share everything about his life with you, even the painful stuff. It may take time, but if he never opens up, then he doesn't like you. 



9. He lets you hurt his feelings 

You know that awful feeling when you text a guy and he takes forever to respond if he responds at all? When a guy likes you and you blow him off (for work or anything really), he won't be afraid to tell you that it hurt.

If a guy is willing to show his fish belly white underbelly to you it means he trusts you with his heart. And his fish belly. If you ignore a guy or reschedule a date ad nauseam and he just goes with it,  he's holding back. And come to mention it, if you're doing all of that maybe you are too! 


10. He is so happy 

When you really like someone, they make you happy. And more often than not, that happiness leaks into every arena of your life, turning you into that asshole who is running around singing in public and greeting everyone with a smile.

If a guy likes you, he's going to be happy. He's going to be smiley. He's going to TELL you he's happy, too. Because guess what? The reason for his happiness? Why that's you! Mind you, I'm not saying you're responsible for his happiness in the long-term but this first flush of lurv, that's all you. Yes, THAT is how you know if a guy likes you. 


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