Photo: WeHeartIt
They might make you reconsider abstinence.
By Tom Burns — Written on Jul 28, 2016
Everyone has awkward sex stories.
If you’ve ever had sex before, you definitely have a bad sex story buried deep in the back of your mind, fighting your every urge to repress it. And, even if you’ve never had sex before, you’ve probably heard countless “that time everything went south” stories from your sexually active friends.
Why are there so many cringe-worthy sex stories out there?
Because sex is super weird, guys.
Don’t get me wrong — it’s GREAT. (Well, it can be great.) But it also involves human bodies and fluids and strange noises and toys and boundary pushing and… it’s just weird. Gloriously weird. So, when you’re participating in something so fundamentally odd, from time to time, strange things are going to arise. (And not just the penises.)
This is why we’re so lucky to live in the age of YouTube.
Think about it — before YouTube, you could only hear a hilariously uncomfortable sex story if someone either told you it in person or if you heard it second- or third-hand. But, thanks to YouTube and its culture of WAY too honest confessional videos, you can listen to a first-hand account of a weird, bad sex story from halfway across the world.
And the selection is AMAZING. There are OMG sex stories of every fashion and flavor in YouTube. You can hear a man’s perspective, a woman’s perspective, you can hear about any fetish you can think of and how those fetishes can go horribly, horribly wrong. YouTube is an awkward confessional gold-mine.
So, if you’ve recently had “not your proudest moment” during sex (or if you just want to cringe and giggle), check out 8 of our favorite awkward sex confessions on YouTube:
1. “Going Gyno” does not sound fun.
This fun BuzzfeedYellow video captures several quick anecdotes of sexy times gone wrong — ranging from falling asleep in the act, getting caught texting while thrusting, and a man telling his partner that he was going to have to “go gyno” on her. (It’s not a fun thing to have to confess.)
2. “So you’re NOT a sleepwalker?”
Lisa Schwartz’s lisbug YouTube channel has over 1.9 million subscribers and, in this segment titled “Two Broken Girls,” the girls recount their most awkward sexual experiences. You won’t want to look away during the extended story about getting your period during sex and trying to escape by pretending to be a sleepwalker. (Doesn’t work.)
3. It must make sex in Hawaii awkward.
Comedian Kevin Hart is a little more famous than most YouTube celebrities, but it was hard to pass up this clip where Hart recounts his own uncomfortable moments during sex and confirms that his safe word in the bedroom is “Pineapples.”
4. You want to put your feet WHERE?
Laci Green’s Sex Ed for the Internet channel is awesome and so is this video where Laci and a friend tell some of their most embarrassing sexual anecdotes, which include problems with loud queefing, getting interrupted mid-act by the police, and one man’s odd request to place his feet somewhere VERY uncomfortable.
5. Strangers tell the best sex stories.
Chris Klemens had some fun, man-on-the-street style, when he headed out and tried to find strangers who would tell him wild sex stories. Fortunately, he found some remarkably honest strangers who told him stories about bleeding, fisting, and having sex on the side of a mountain (it was an 87-year-old woman who told him that one).
6. They’re awkward because they’re true.
This video is a little different. It’s a really compelling, honest, and funny video where people with various physical disabilities talk about how their dating and sex lives can often become rather awkward. If you’re looking for the good sexy bits, stick around until the 1:30 mark when a woman describes what it’s like to have a seizure during sex (and have your partner not notice).
7. Cats are assholes.
College Humor animated this awkward sex story for their “Dating: It’s Complicated” series, a story in which a cat named Shamrock finds a way to narc on a teenaged couple having sex (without their parents knowing about it).
8. That wasn’t a fart.
This longer confessional video from Chicago style-blogger Sarah Rae Vargas collects some of her own most embarrassing sexual moments. The highlight is definitely the way she owns her tendency to queef more loudly than her partners would probably expect.