Kids can be assholes when it comes to your sex life.
Being a parent is exhausting, and it can be challenging trying to get in a little adult fun. When you do finally manage to get the kids to bed and have a little energy for sex, it's inevitable that your kids will interrupt.
Let's be honest: kids can be self-centered assh*les when it comes to your love life.
Nobody Likes A Cockblock addresses this issue, and is described as a full-color children's book for adults who aren't getting any. It features illustrated woodland creature moms and dads just trying to get a little sexy time.
The Indiegogo campaign for the book says, "Millions of parents around the world are being cockblocked by their children left and right. Whether you are a mom who has been cockblocked by fatigue from a two-year-old who doesn't know what 'Goodnight' means, or a dad who is being cockblocked by a child selfishly sleeping in between you and your spouse with their hand on her titty as if to say, 'I own this titty now,' you are not alone."
Here's an excerpt from the book so you can get an idea of its hilariously naughty tone:
The stars are out,
It's dark outside.
I can see that there's sleep
inside your eyes.
Stay warm in your bed,
on our door do not knock,
because nobody likes
The train's leaving the station,
it's about to go down.
My ticket is stamped
for a trip to Pound Town.
Your job is to sleep like the heaviest rock,
Because nobody likes a cockblock.
All photos: Indiegogo
Nobody Likes a Cockblock is a perfect gift for baby showers, birthdays or for parents — new or old — who want to laugh their blue balls and blue vulvas away.