Self

9 Things To Expect From Amy Schumer And J-Law's New Movie

Photo: WeHeartIt, IMDb
Jen and Amy

For fans of girl power, get excited. Amy Schumer and Jennifer Lawrence are teaming up! According to Lawrence, they're writing a script together.

All that she revealed was that they'll play sisters. Also, it's going to be a comedy ... at least, that's what everyone's assuming. Although, it would be pretty great if they wrote a serious action movie together.

Whenever this movie gets released, it's going to be the white girl power movie of that season. If it wasn't for that Wayans brothers movie, White Chicks would probably be the best name for this movie.

How great would it be if they just remade White Chicks and  cast themselves in the Wayans Brothers roles? Obviously, that isn't going to happen, but it would be amazingly bizarre if they did.

Fans are already excited for the movie, and why shouldn't they be? The thing is, while it'll probably be a good movie, it won't be a surprising movie. Schumer's act is clever, but we all know what topics she likes to cover at this point.

The jokes themselves will be new, but the overall plot will probably be pretty predictable. Here are 10 things to expect from the Amy Schumer and Jennifer Lawrence team-up movie:

1. Lots of drinking.

To start off, we're going to guess that there's going to be a lot of jokes about getting drunk. Expect at least three montages of people drinking and getting more and more drunk as they montage along.


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2. Pretending that Amy Schumer isn't attractive.

This is a thing a lot of Hollywood movies do. They take a girl like Amy Schumer and pretend she isn't pretty. Just because she hasn't had any work done to make her face look like a typical super model, Hollywood thinks audiences will buy that no one wants to bang her.


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3. Endless raunchy humor.

All that we really know about the movie is that Schumer and Lawrence play sisters, but it's safe to say that this isn't going to be a family movie. We're just basing this off of every single thing Amy Schumer has ever been involved with.


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4. Girl power.

This probably will come more from the studio than the stars, but there's going to be a lot of attention put on the fact that two girls wrote the script. Anytime women make a movie, Hollywood thinks that's all they need to sell the movie. It's not surprising when women accomplish things anymore, OK?


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5. Jokes about being slutty.

We're going to assume that at least one of the sisters is going to be "the slutty one." If that's the case, we're also going to assume that that sister will point out how she's having a good time and isn't doing anything wrong.


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6. Constant comparisons between Amy's body and Jennifer's.

Since they're supposedly playing sisters, it's pretty obvious that a big chunk of the movie is going to be devoted to pointing out that Lawrence is more attractive than Schumer.


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7. Making fun of nerds.

Amy Schumer caused some minor controversy when she pissed off Lucasfilm by taking raunchy Star Wars themed photos. Jennifer Lawrence is famous for The Hunger Games and X-Men movies. Both girls have big nerd credibility, so it won't be surprising if there's some gentle (or not-so-gentle) ribbing of nerd culture.


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8. Praise ... before it even comes out.

Look, both Schumer and Lawrence have great track records. It's pretty likely that the movie will be good. It's also likely that it'll start getting praise before it's released simply because it's got girl power. People will just be excited for that alone, and start calling it great before they even see it.


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9. All the annoyed dumb guys.

Lastly, there are going to be a lot of riot guys who will be annoyed at all the girl power on display. Even though it doesn't effect them, they'll complain about Hollywood used to be manly, and how this movie is just another example of how liberals are taking over.

They'll also still go see it.


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