Oops, excuse me, there — my age is showing. But honestly, enough is enough amirite?
"You're pregnant?! Was it planned?"
"You're a mom?! Oh my gaaahhh, I could never be a mom right now! I'm way too irresponsible. Aren't you sad you can't party? Or have a life? Oh my gahhh!"
"Oh, you're Catholic/Mormon/Mexican/Southern? No wonder you're a young mom!"
"Ha. Babies having babies ..."
"I'm so sorry. You could've done big things with your life."
"If my tax-payer money is going to pay for that baby, I'll have an opinion about it." (I see this gem in Internet comment sections all the time.)
"Is that your husband? I mean boyfriend ... I mean baby daddy ... I mean ..."
"Are your parents here to help you?"
"So? Where's your ring? When's the big day?"
"Well, at least you're a MILF."
"Do your kids have the same father?"
"Ugh, I could never have a kid yet. I don't want to ruin my life."
"You look WAY too young to have a baby!"