Photo: panophotograph/ Shutterstock
Have you never had a guy stick around for too long? There may be a reason why, and it could be you.
By Laura Lifshitz — Last updated on Jul 02, 2023
Ladies, we usually mean well but sometimes we shoot ourselves in our own two feet when it comes to finding and snagging love.
If you’re doing any of these things you’re most likely scaring men away like hotcakes. Simmer down and break away from Crazy-town and you too, can find love.
Here are 10 ways you singlehandedly scare away every man you meet:
1. Not giving him space
Are you giving him any space, or are you all up in his personal zone to remind him, "Hey, it’s me again! Don’t forget me!"
2. Oversharing
It’s good to share when you’ve built trust with someone, but do you need to tell him your darkest, dirtiest deeds on date #1? Probably not my friend! SSH!
3. Being overly dramatic
Hey, I love a good monologue more than anyone I know, but you may want to cool it with the dramatics and leave the crocodile tears until he knows you well enough to know that you mean well, and can’t help but unleash a good cry now and then!
4. Not addressing your daddy issues
Hey, a lot of us have them and I get it 100%, but you may want to keep those daddy issues in check and even deal with them, or that nice man you just met may run for the hills and FAST.
5. Pushing for an engagement ring
If you like it then you "shoulda put a ring on it?" Don’t push so hard to get what you want because not only will that result in the dude backing away further, but you should also want a man that offers himself up rather than gives up what you want because of your pressure. You deserve the best. Take it easy and the baby tiger will come purring. Remember, men are babies sometimes. They scare easily!
6. Talking about other guys you've slept with
And then this one time at band camp? No. No. No. NO! Your new hottie doesn’t want to know about the time you first had anal with your last boyfriend. Remember men are hunters and don’t want to be reminded of who "sprayed" there last. Sure, you have the right to own your own sex life, but just don’t advertise it to your new potential honey.
7. Drop the "love" word too fast
There’s nothing wrong with falling in love but if you’re telling him on the second date, you might as well pack it up and call it over today. I hate to say hold back your feelings but … hold back your feelings. #1. Even if you think it’s love that soon, it might be just hormones. Love develops over time. Sparks and physical chemistry exist right away, but that’s not love. #2. It’s hormones.
8. Exhibiting irrational jealousy
Even if your eyes are a shade of emerald, don’t get jealous. Okay, so that’s easier to say than do sometimes. Keep the jealous comments to yourself. If you let them rip, he’s going to think you’re possessive and that’s not cool. You wouldn’t want him to be that way either.
9. Not ordering real food
Just stop it and order a damn meal when you’re with your new guy. He’s not out with a gerbil. He’s out with a woman. Order with confidence or he may think you’ve got body issues, which no guy wants to deal with. And if you do, get help. There’s no shame in that!
10. Getting your freak on too early
There’s nothing wrong with doing the nasty but if you’re in it for more than just his nether parts then you’ve got to wait. I know that’s lame as hell but if you get intimate too soon, you may end up getting your heart and head confused, and ending up involved with someone that’s not really right for you because your heart and vagina’s signals got crossed and now someone caught feelings for a bad guy.
More for You:
Laura Lifshitz is a former MTV personality and Columbia University graduate currently writing about divorce, sex, women’s issues, fitness, parenting, and marriage. Her work has been featured on YourTango, New York Times, DivorceForce, Women’s Health, Working Mother, Pop Sugar, and more.