Bad news for you brown-eyed folk...
Our eyes tell so much about us. When someone is angry, sad, happy, bored, annoyed or just having a “meh” day, we can see it in their eyes. The eyes aren’t just the window to the soul, as Shakespeare wrote hundreds of years ago, but a major way in how we communicate our emotions to those around us. It’s a glimpse into our very thoughts and with one prolonged stare or shift of our eyes, we can say so much.
But have you ever considered that maybe the color of your eyes could be very telling about you and your personality as well? According to several studies, your eye color has a lot to say about you. Let’s break it down, shall we?
If you have dark eyes…
You can’t handle your liquor, you hot mess you! You’re basically that person who gets sloppy drunk at the bar and whose friends, with lighter eyes, need to carry home. But, you do have some redeeming qualities, too, because, on average, you’re friendly and quite generous with those you love. You can also be trusted, but apparently not trusted to avoid being a drunken mess every weekend.
Those with dark eyes tend to be dominating and have a thirst for power that their light colored eyed buddies just don’t have. You, my dark eyed friends, are also great at sports, most notably tennis and other sports that involve racquets, although a quick Google search confirmed what I already knew: Both John McEnroe and Bjorn Borg, two of the greatest tennis players of all time, have blue eyes … so, yeah; take that with a grain of salt.
People with dark eyes can’t really handle pain all that well, and that, according to science, is proven by the fact that women respond faster to epidurals than their blue-eyed counterparts. But if their baby shares their dark eyed gene, that kiddo won’t get as much attention as a blue-eyed baby in the family might. (I don’t know how many times I’ve told my sister that my blue eyes and I were the favorite; I’m so happy I finally have proof.)
If you have light eyes…
You’re awesome, because you’re like me. You’re also kind of bitch, again, like me. While you can handle your alcohol more than your dark eyed friends, you also tend to abuse it and are prone to binge drinking, which, in the long run is far worse than falling off a stool after three drinks every weekend. Three drinks don’t murder the liver quite like binge drinking.
People with light eyes can handle pain like champs, and women with light eyes are less likely to suffer from postpartum sadness. As I wrote above, the dark eyed people have all the hunger for dominating and success, but that might just be because the blue-eyed babies are treated as babies longer ― it’s those stunning eyes of theirs.
Light-eyed people are not good at sports, and I can attest to this because I was consistently picked last for teams during gym. High school was a dark time for me. Whatever. I’m highly intellectual based on this study, and so are you, if you have blue eyes. So there; we still win.
But the real question here, research aside, is how well does this hold true to the majority? My blue eyes and I seem to measure up pretty close, but how about you?