Who remembers 7 minutes in heaven!?
The funniest part about hookup games, aside from the obvious, is that they typically commence at an age you aren't really "hooking up" much at all. At least not to the point where these games can really get interesting. Not that a good make out isn't the best thing ever.
Let's be honest: these days, hookup games are likely not even being played by today's youth anymore. In fact, I'd be shocked if anyone under the age of 21 has even heard of most of these. Not that I blame them. It's a different era — who needs a riveting match of spin the bottle when you can just hop on Tinder?
For now, we're going to forget this digital age and the borderline disturbing ease in which it enables getting booty. Instead, we're going relive the glory days of literally being tongue-tied due to nerves with these seven games from the past.
1. Truth or Dare
Of all sexual games out there, this one is probably the only one that will continue to stand the test of time. Perhaps that's because of its overwhelming versatility — from making someone run down the block naked to getting your friend to admit his secret crush, there's really no end to the hijinks that can ensue.
2. Spin the Bottle
If you think about it, this could really be considered the primitive form of recycling. Not just because the entire game relies on repurposing a glass bottle (plastic doesn't spin as well) to point out who you'll be smooching, but also because that bottle could easily land on the same person over and over. Although, if adhering to old school rules, that recycling usually requires an extra element (like tongue).
3. Seven Minutes in Heaven
In the early days of this game, there was so much stress about who you were entering the closet with that by the time you actually got in there, calmed down, and got over the fact that you ended up in there with someone you aren't thrilled about (or worse, your top choice!), you barely had time for a boob grab before your friends were busting down the door. These days, there's walk-ins! Enough said.
4. Suck and Blow
Remember Clueless? Then you have to remember when Elton purposely didn't suck the playing card, resulting in it dropping from his lips just in time to plant one on Cher's. The point of the game is to actually inhale so said card stays pinned to your mouth while you pass it around the circle. Unless you're sneaky little sailor like Elton. "God Elton, can't you suck?!"
5. Hide and Go Get Some
You have to appreciate the play on words here. Not to mention, taking a timeless childhood tradition and just dirtying it the hell up. So while the fundamental rules remain in tact (one hides, the other seeks), it changes drastically once you're found. The seeker has to come into your hiding place and proceed to get it on with you. Wherever that is — behind a tree, in a hopefully spacious cabinet, you get it. Now, this one may be better when you're older, minus the size factor.
6. Hot Sauce
While I can't say I've played this one, I'm pretty sure I would've owned it given my affinity for hot sauce. Here's the rundown: round-up four people and pair two couples against each other. Both couples dribble a hot sauce of their choosing on their tongues and see who can make out without dying the longest. It's all very erotic.
7. Strip Twister
This one's pretty self-explanatory, but also arguably the most X-rated of the bunch. This is largely rooted in the fact that each spin requires discarding an article of clothing before taking the position. Oh, and in case you don't remember the game, those positions can be borderline Kama Sutra-esque. Let's just hope you're very comfortable with these people.