The Liberating Side of Being Together

Is Good Sex Contagious?

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Friends have more sex
Want better sex? Find better friends ... well, sort of.
Kissing and telling could improve your sex life.

We already knew that your inner circle could affect your drinking habits and weight, but now, a new study from the University of Colorado — Boulder, says that your sex life and consequently your happiness, are affected by the sex lives of your friends.

According to the study, even if you are having sex regularly, finding out that a friend is having more sex than you will make you unhappy. If you find out that you have sex the most often out of your circle of friends, this knowledge will increase your happiness. "My clients say that when their friends tell them that they are having sex every day, sometimes twice in one day, it makes them feel discouraged,” says Dr. Stephanie Buehler, psychologist and author of What Every Mental Health Professional Needs To Know About Sex. Could the key to better sex be keeping tight-lipped about what goes on behind closed doors? 

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Not necessarily, according to psychotherapist Dr. Judi Cinéas, who encourages kissing and telling with your friends for better sex. "When good friends find something that is working for them, they should share it with one another," she says. "When certain sexual behaviors seem taboo, people are reluctant to try it. But, once your friends are doing it, it destigmatizes the behavior, making it feel more acceptable to try."

Dr. Buehler agrees. "Ten years ago almost no woman in my office described having anal sex with their partner," she says. "Today, lots of women tell me that they have tried anal sex, often times because a friend told them that it was an out-of-this-world experience." Keep reading...

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