The book Fifty Shades Of Grey is rocketing up the fiction best-seller charts as well as the underwears of America's women. Because of its content, the book has inspired many essays about BDSM, sexual power and contemporary, American ladies. The most popular essay, thus far, has been from Katie Roiphe in The Daily Beast.
And here come the boo birds. Jessica Wakeman, a friend writing for The Frisky, castigated Roiphe as a person "who both loathes contemporary feminism and does not understand BDSM in the slightest" and thus marginalizes her assessment wholecloth. Wakeman's central thesis was, well, hard to find, but I think she was saying something to the affect of (paraphrasing) "if a modern lady finds pleasure in getting her little bottom paddled, it doesn't make her any less likely to think women are awesome." A sentiment that's impossible to refute.
Wakeman has written before about her own difficulty reconciling the enjoyment of spanking with her feminist views, but I don't think it's that hard, because:
1. We like what we like. Somewhere along the way the neuron that says, "spankings feel kinda good in a certain context" gets flipped, and that's a wrap. It doesn't matter if you love Jesus, hate the board of directors of the company that makes ping-pong paddles or define yourself as someone who thinks men and women should be equal in all things.
2. Sex, even the gentle stuff, sort of hurts. Stretching out the most sensitive part of your body and vigorously slamming it back and forth can induce a few winces. Pleasure and pain, sorry to be trite, aren't too terribly far apart. I've seen a few of you orgasm, and it doesn't always look like you're experiencing bliss. And to be fair, my O face probably looks like I was just shot with a crossbow. Read more...
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