Top 10 Surprising Ways To Get A Guy to Commit

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Couple in the fall
Rori Raye's counter-intuitive tips on getting your man to commit.

At first, dating expert Rori Raye's ideas about how to get a man to commit seemed counter-intuitive: Don't be his girlfriend? Don't try to win him over? But then we realized this: Rori wants us to get a man to commit by being our most authentic selves, which, in turn, allows men to be their most authentic selves. And that makes a lot of sense.

These tips are only the beginning. If you want more of Rori's wisdom check out her blog and newsletter, Have The Relationship You Want, where she goes into much more detail.

1. Love him, but don't be his girlfriend. Being his girlfriend means being exclusive with out a "forever" promise. If you want to get married, don't be his girlfriend. A man might tell you that he needs time to decide if you're right for him, but according to Rori men know very soon whether or not you're the One.

2. Don't be exclusive until you're engaged. Once you've become exclusive and have your eye on marriage, a man can sense that you're thinking about the relationship, wondering where things are going, hoping he loves you as much as you love him—all of which are totally normal feelings, but they make men withdraw emotionally, says Rori. Not being exclusive gives you room to breath, relax and really figure out if this is the relationship for you, which allows him to fall for you without worrying that you're overly invested in him.

3. Date more than one man at once. The corollary to not being exclusive is dating more than one guy at a time. That way you can compare men to each other, you don't feel urgent about one particular man, and you're able to be open to new opportunities. Of course, if he's ready to commit and marry you then by all means, be exclusive—but not until he's ready to really commit.

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