During college, I dated a self-proclaimed "former pothead." As someone who had never smoked anything, I initially found his old hobby a huge turnoff. Potheads were like Harold & Kumar, Bob Marley and Willie Nelson: fun, but not someone you could take seriously.
After getting to know him, however, I realized that there are a lot drug habits worse than using marijuana recreationally, especially if it he'd already renounced his habit. The guy could have been into crack. He could have been a serial drunk driver. In the end, I stopped caring since there was a lot more to him than just his past with pot. Heck, I'd even date a casual pot user again...maybe. Here are a few pros and cons to consider when you can't decide if weed usage is a dealbreaker or not.
1. You can learn from their taste in music and movies. Chances are, a pothead's iTunes folder will contain one of two genres of music: synthy Europop or a lot of reggaeton to facilitate the spacing out that accompanies smoking a joint. Meanwhile, his Netflix subscription may contain colorful, trippy films like The Wizard of Oz or 2001: A Space Odyssey, which are infinitely better under the influence of drugs. While exposure to pot may not be good for you, exposure to different music and movies will invariably deepen your pop culture palate.
2. They're low-stress. Isn't it annoying to date someone who doesn't know how to relax? If you prefer guys or gals who aren't preoccupied with planning every minute of a date or with checking their iPhones 24/7, a pot smoker may be the match for you.
3. They have funny stories to tell. Bored? Ask him about the first time he got high, and watch him launch into an epic tale of misdeeds. If you've already heard that story, ask him whether he's ever gotten close to being busted (yes), whether he's ever sneaked someone a pot brownie (yes), or how she met her dealer.
4. When a high goes wrong, they can help out. We recently read a story on Gothamist about two high school girls who were hospitalized after eating a pot brownie. Yikes! Not everyone takes to marijuana, but you can trust a stoner to know what to do when someone needs help during a bad trip. On a related note, while YourTango does not condone illegal activity, we will recommend consulting your pot-smoking boyfriend if you ever feel like trying it out. You should not attempt to get high for the first time without an experienced person present.
5. You might accidentally eat a pot brownie. Or if he's a jerk, he might sneak you some or make you feel like a total prude for not wanting to smoke up. If he or she can't respect your choices or he makes you feel guilty about them, move on. Otherwise, stay far, far away from home-baked pastries.
6. You get used to the funky smell. This is the same problem non-smokers have when they date a cigarette smoker. Do you really want to come out from his apartment smelling like burnt rope?
7. Stoners deny the side effects, but you'll have to deal with them anyway. Pot proponents often argue that marijuana is healthier than alcohol and nicotine since it's all natural and supposedly non-addictive. That doesn't mean they won't suffer a few inconvenient side effects, which include a lower sperm count, a faster aging process, and depression from emotional withdrawal.
8. Pot stories can get old after awhile. Pot stories are like drunken night out stories. They're amusing at first, but they get old if they're the only funny thing you can talk about. If your guy or gal doesn't know how to have fun or even be funny without weed, you might want to look elsewhere.
Demi Lovato is dating Wilmer Valderama, who played Fez on That 70s Show and is also the worst and a monster and super older than her. He's known for dating actresses much younger than he is (think "barely legal" status), so poor Demi might only have a month or two left before she ages out of the game.
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