We haven't attended a whole lot of famous people's weddings, but we imagine they are fantastic affairs with peacocks wandering around and ice sculptures of the happy couple and passed hors d'oeuvres that are never too small or too messy. And of course, given that the famous people are often trained performers, we expect a lot out of their reception dancing. Surely they can do better than that couple from Minnesota! But not every famous couple can be Khlodom, slow-dancing their way into a lifetime of bliss to the dulcet strains of Lionel Richie and Diana Ross singing "Endless Love." Here are some couples and what we'd like to see them play at their lavish destination weddings.
Madonna & Jesus Luz
The twice-married Madge has said she'll never tie the knot again, but if she did make an honest man out of her boytoy, model Jesus Luz, we imagine their reception playlist would go a little something like this:
- "Cradle of Love," Billy Idol
- "Grown Woman," Mary J. Blige
- "What Child Is This," Sarah McLachlan (but only if they get married in December)
- "Like a Prayer," by the blushing bride herself
Justin has dated a basketball team's worth of beautiful women, and now that he's moved on from Jessica Biel to Rihanna (um, maybe), we're wondering if the Bahamian beauty could be the one. Their nuptials would blend blue-eyed soul with reggaeton in a particularly odd way.
- "What Goes Around," J.Tim (we didn't write the song, he did!)
- "On to the Next One," Jay-z
- "Better Be Good to Me," Tina Turner
- "Southern Man," Neil Young
Kirstie Alley & Jamie Foxx
Kirstie spent the week tweeting frantically about her torrid affair with Jamie Foxx, which makes us feel weird in ways we cannot explain. Come on, that is a strange pairing. Stranger than Ted Danson and Whoopi Goldberg. But, you know, we wish them the best, and that Jamie would also take to social media to express his feelings for all the world to see. Their wedding songs would all have titles 140 characters long or fewer.