Imagine a woman: She has a college degree and a job, she pays for her own house and car, and she's not intimidated by any man for any reason. She's smart, independent and strong. Discuss: Why are strong independant woman are considered bitches?
Isn't it a puzzle, then, that she has sexual fantasies of being dominated?
Actually, researchers say, it makes perfect sense.
In perhaps the most fun assignment ever, Psychology Today's news editor, Matthew Hutson, has been blogging about why strong women fantasize about aggressive lovers. Mmm, do tell!
Way back in 1973, researcher and therapist E. Barbara Hinton interviewed women about their fantasies and—surprise, surprise—women said they fantasized being "forcefully taken." She discovered women fantasize about aggressive lovers because it makes the women feel desirable, not because they like being physically hurt or rejected.
In recent years, University of Kansas psychologist Patricia Hawley has picked up where Hinton left off. In April, she published a paper in the Journal of Sex Research that studied how the genders respond to domination fantasies. Both men and women enjoyed fantasies in which they were dominant, but socially dominant women were actually more turned on than anyone else by submission fantasies. Read: Infusing Fantasy Into Your Sex Life
This led Hawley to probe further. The rationale, her studies seem to indicate, is that ladies don't enjoy the forcefulness itself as much as the idea that an overpowering passion is bubbling over behind that forcefulness. A socially dominant woman, in particular, was more likely to fantasize she was sexually irresistible and was turned on by the idea that her partner was so engorged with lust that he was going to burst.
More from The Frisky: