Learn How to Communicate for More Pleasure and Deeper Intimacy


Learn How to Communicate for More Pleasure and Deeper Intimacy
Learn how massage can be a crash course in communication!

Finding words during a massage or sex is easier for some people than others. Explore communicating your pleasure and wishes with your body movements, gestures and sounds. If your partner is doing something you love, tell them by moaning or sighing. Move your body into their touch. Use your hands and guide them in exactly the kind of touch you want - put your hands over theirs and show them what would feel good. Then, take your hands away and allow them to continue. Use hand gestures and agree ahead of time on what they mean - if you want more pressure, wave them forward. If you want to slow down, use a flat palm. This is a lot like helping someone parallel park - waving frantically means "Come on, you've got lots of space!" but a firm show of the palm means "Stop!" You can develop a whole language with your hands that can give one another very specific information without using a single word.

Whenever possible, offer positive feedback. Tell your partner what is feeling good and what they are doing well. "That feels good, could you do it a little softer?" This builds confidence and makes it easier to hear requests for change. If the only time you say anything is negative or demanding, your lover may lost patience. Thanking them and giving them positive feedback as much as you can, with your words, sounds, movements and gestures, will enhance your experience and make it easier for you both to hear the more challenging feedback. Also pay attention to how you phrase these requests - "I hate it when you tickle me like that!" feels really different to hear than "I really enjoy deeper pressure" or "Can you use a firmer stroke, my thighs are really sensitive right there."

Telling your lover what worked highly increases the chances of receiving that same touch in the future - it adds that move to the repetoire of pleasure that you can draw from again and again. 


Ready to experience your full erotic potential? Visit PleasureMechanics.com for videos and ebooks offering proven techniques for more sexual pleasure. Learn couples massage, erotic touch techniques and strategies for a healthier, happier relationships.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Pleasure Mechanics

Sex Educator

Ready to become a better lover and unleash way more pleasure? We're here to guide you every step of the way!

Exclusive Offer For YourTango Readers! Use the code YourTango to receive 20% off any of our 10 foreplay mastery or couples massage video guides! www.PleasureMechanics.com

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Pleasure Mechanics:

6 Foreplay Tips That Will Lead To Better Sex


Do you want better sex, more intimacy and stronger orgasms? Do you want to feel more sexually satisfied and have way more fun in bed? Yes? Then it is time to go back to the basics and recommit to Foreplay 101. Foreplay isn't just about going through the motions to get to the "main event." The art of foreplay is all about seduction: preparing ... Read more

Masturbation Ruins Sex! And Other Myths About Self-Pleasuring


Do you have secret concerns about masturbation? Do you enjoy solo sex but feel a bit guilty about it, or worry that it will ruin your sex life? Ever wonder if the way you are masturbating is doing you more harm than good? If so, you are not alone! Masturbation remains a taboo topic of conversation so many of us silently worry about this most personal sexual ... Read more

Best Sex Positions For Maximizing Your Pleasure


Want more pleasurable, more orgasmic sex? If so, you are not alone. As the sex experts at PleasureMechanics.com, we hear from men and women all over the world who love their partner but want to turn up the heat during sex. The good news is that there are lots of ways to make sex way more fun and more orgasmic for women. One way to explore more orgasmic sex is ... Read more

See More

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.