Lower-Middle Class Stay-At-Home Mom Shares 16 Ways Her Home Life Is Different From Wealthier Families

Her honesty offers a true snapshot into the lives of American families today.

Large family smiling for a photo on a couch Lopolo / Shutterstock
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Despite the presence of luxury and income-blindness on social media, many American families are just “surviving” in their day-to-day lives.

One stay-at-home mom on TikTok decided to candidly share what life is really like for a lower-middle class family in America.

While it might not be aesthetically pleasing or up to the standards of out-of-touch influencers online, Mama J. Rae vulnerably shared the ways she has made her family’s home life work. 

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Here are the 16 ways a lower-middle class family’s home life is different from wealthier families, according to a stay-at-home mom. 

   

   

1. Their family of seven lives in a home that's two bedrooms too small. 

Despite pressures from social media to have a picture-perfect home, this family lives in a smaller suburban home just big enough to house their family. 

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In fact, the mom admitted that her family is “just surviving” amidst outrageous housing costs and rising inflation and interest rates. The looming threat of rising housing costs is at the forefront of many middle-American minds as more and more people fall victim to experiencing homelessness over the cost of owning and maintaining a home. 

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2. They share one vehicle, even though they ‘should have’ two. 

While the financial benefits of being a “one-car family” are great, many lower-middle-class families in the United States don’t become one on purpose. Whether it be due to financial hardship, a natural disaster, or an automotive accident, one-car families often deal with more stress

3. They’re more reluctant to upgrade. 

For most families, financial insecurity rips away any hope for non-essential purchasing. Many jobs held by lower and middle-income households in America have insecure wages, no paid time off, and unrealistic schedules. 

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While Rae admitted to sacrificing a bit of her own spending to give her kids nicer things, splurging on anything new or fancy for the home is just not feasible. 

4. Their deep freezer is in a shed outside. 

A trait of many middle-American homes, this family keeps most of their frozen meals in a separate freezer outside. Food is often cheaper when bought in bulk, making the extra storage necessary.

5. Their home has simple furnishings and minimalist home decor. 

Again, the cost of luxury (or even a simple aesthetic) is out of reach for so many Americans. Despite what influencers or social media tell you, not everyone has a grandiose and fully decorated home with matching silverware, plates, cups, curtains, and furnishings. 

   

   

6. They do not have a dishwasher. 

Rae adopted the use of plastic cutlery and disposable plates, cups, and napkins to save time on dishwashing. While it might not be cost-effective for families with a dishwasher, it would ultimately cost this family more time and water to hand wash all their dishes. 

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7. All of their money goes to buying food. 

Rae honestly shared their financial reality as, “Too poor for food, too rich to quality for help.” And that’s the reality for many families struggling to get by, thanks in part to our nation’s social program initiatives

While they would greatly benefit from food stamps or government assistance, their incomes are “too large” despite their lack of food security. 

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8. They run a supplemental business from home to stay afloat. 

Side hustles have become the new normal for many families trying to make ends meet. Not only does this contribute to burnout and a decreased sense of well-being, it breeds a sense of “guilt” for indulging in any type of relaxation or free time. 

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9. Their children share bedrooms and clothes. 

Packed into a relatively small house, their family of seven shares many areas of the home including bedrooms and one small bedroom. 

10. Oftentimes, they live in discomfort because they can't afford to turn on the heat or air conditioning. 

Rae confessed she wouldn't turn the air conditioning on during the summer months and pay the outrageous prices for utilities. 

11. Their carpet has stains that are too difficult to remove without purchasing an expensive appliance. 

Rae showed the carpet in her house that’s riddled with stains from her kids over the years. Unless they come across a carpet cleaner at the thrift store, it will likely stay that way until they have more disposable income to spend on a cleaner. 

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12. Many of their possessions come from the thrift store. 

The mom showed their “home office” complete with a keyboard and computer purchased from the thrift store. 

   

   

Thinking about access to the internet during the pandemic, if these children were not issued computers by their school, they would have to share this one with their parents.

13. Birthday and holiday decorations are reused each year. 

Rae also admitted to saving decorations for holidays like Christmas and her kids’ birthdays. 

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With the average American spending almost $300 on holiday decorations each year, this mom’s routine has saved them a little bit of money that they can allocate to other areas. 

14. Their family uses only generic medications when they’re sick. 

High costs of medications in the United States have hurt lower-income families at a disproportionate rate. For this family, over-the-counter medications for a small illness are only being treated with generic medications. 

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The sad reality is that for anything worse than a small cold, many Americans are skipping the use of medications due to outrageous costs (even with health insurance). 

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15. Car repairs are often pushed off unless the car isn’t running. 

Only having one car makes automotive repairs difficult and unless they have help from family or friends, giving their car up for even one day is impossible. So for things like a broken windshield wiper, the family is not taking their car in for repairs. 

16. They only drink from water bottles because they can't trust the city's supply. 

Studies show that daily water intake is drastically lower for financially strapped families. This is mostly due to access to clean water. 

Water crises like those in Flint, Michigan have illuminated a much larger issue of access to sanitary drinking water. This family spends money to buy plastic water bottles and they have no other choice. 

Rae's refreshingly honest TikTok is a reminder that not everything has to be “aesthetically pleasing” and overconsumption to achieve that standard is not feasible. 

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This mom’s vulnerability is what makes her a relatable creator. Her family’s reality is that of many across the United States today. Her relatable content and positive attitude can help to create a more inclusive community, especially for children growing up on social media. 

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Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer at YourTango focusing on pop culture analysis and human interest stories.

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